Les Edgerton on Writing

New reviews of THE BITCH and an interview

2012-01-28T08:38:00.000-08:00

HI folks,

I wanted to share with you a review that just came out today from noir-master, Nigel Bird, for my novel, THE BITCH. To use Paul D. Brazill's excellent term--I'm chuffed! Thank you so much, Nigel!

http://nigelpbird.blogspot.com/

And, then there's another wonderful post on it from Anne Gallagher at: http://piedmontwriter.blogspot.com/2012/01/fridays-at-piedmont-grille_27.html

Also, I did an interview with writer Karen Lenfestey yesterday and you can read it on her blogsite at http://karensnovels.weebly.com/author-interviews.html

There's even a photo of an ugly dude and of Karen... She asked me what coffee shop I wanted to meet at and I told her my son Mike's Starbucks where he works... She was going to take the photo inside and Mike told us Starbucks would sue us if we took photos inside their premises. Nice, Mike...

Blue skies,
Les

You have got to read this...

2012-01-26T08:05:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

The brilliant writer, Paul D. Brazill (whom I'm pleased as a monkey in a vat of bananas to also call my friend), knows I'm a big Gordon Ramsey fan. Which is why he sent me this link to a story concerning Mr. Ramsey's double, a dwarf who appears... er... appeared in porn movies. I'm still laughing... Check it out.

http://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/news/weird/gordon-ramsays-dwarf-porn-double-found-dead-in-a-badger-den-in-wales/story-e6frev20-1226137951576

So sad...

I'm sending flowers... miniature, or tea roses...

Blue skies,
Les

Update--JUST LIKE THAT sales are booming!

2012-01-25T07:19:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

Well, it's happening... Sales for JUST LIKE THAT are going through the roof! Got up today and checked on the Amazon rankings and here's where it stood, two days after the freebie promo. Whenever a book goes below 1,000 in the rankings, that's major stuff! It's also impacting my other novels' sales as they're all going up as well. And, it's all thanks to you guys! I'm going to take you all out for a beer or coffee! THANK YOU!

And, please tell your friends about it--it would be so great to get into the top ten...

Product Details

JUST LIKE THAT
Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars See all reviews (17 customer reviews)
Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #869 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)

#55 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Fiction > Literary Fiction
#74 in Books > Literature & Fiction > Literary

BEST DEAL SINCE SLICED BREAD!

2012-01-24T15:17:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

Deals all over the place! Bare Knuckles Press, publisher of THE BITCH has just offered a one-week special on it at a mere 99 cents! This… is a deal! Dare I say—a SUPER DEAL??!! While I’d like to be modest and unassuming… well, I’d like to appear as such anyway… this is the best book I’ve yet published in my opinion. I’m very, very proud of it. So, I hope you all glom onto a copy and see why I think so and if you agree. Also, some pretty fair country writers have chimed in with terrific blurbs that agree with that assessment. Click here to take advantage of the offer! http://www.amazon.com/The-Bitch-ebook/dp/B006P2NLHG/ref=sr_1_7_title_0_main?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1327446399&sr=1-7

THE BITCH won the Preditors and Editors Readers Poll Award for Best Thriller of 2011!

JUST LIKE THAT

The freebie promo for JUST LIKE THAT was a smashing success! Over 14,000 copies were downloaded in just two days to Kindles and it stayed at #1 in Literary Fiction for both days. But, the proof that it was successful was that after it went back to its regular price, it remained high in the sales rankings. It looks like I’ve got some new readers and that’s what we were after. Thank you to everyone who helped me get the word out and got their own copies as well. Hope you’ll like the read enough to post a review on Amazon and Goodreads. If you haven’t gotten a copy, you can here for only $2.99. http://www.amazon.com/Just-Like-That-ebook/dp/B005GHDY82/ref=sr_1_1_title_1_kin?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1327446399&sr=1-1

It’s been an exhilarating week! What us writer-types visualize during the many long hours we sit hunched over our ‘puters. Makes us appreciate our readers!

To whom I say, simply… THANK YOU!

Blue skies,

Les

THANK YOU!

2012-01-23T16:10:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

Well, the results of the two-day promo for JUST LIKE THAT just came in. Over 14,000 people downloaded it! I just want to thank everybody who did from the bottom of my heart. And, it looks like the purpose of such a promo--to introduce people to my work and to lead to sales of my other books... is working well. We're already seeing healthy sales of all my other books! So, again... thank you! And, it looks as if the folks who didn't download the freebie are buying copies of it now as well.

Blue skies,
Les

We're #1!

2012-01-22T09:03:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

Well, okay... I'm not talking about the national football or basketball championship here, but still...

When I got up this morning, I checked to see how JUST LIKE THAT was doing after the first day of the freebie promotion... and was dazzled. At the time, it was at #17 in all Kindle sales and #1 in category sales (Literary Fiction). Well, not "sales" as it was free yesterday and today, but copies downloaded. My publisher just emailed me to tell me the numbers that were moved and yesterday over 8,000 people downloaded copies! Now... that's a bunch! Just wish I could have made some money on that! But, the whole point is to get my work out there and known a bit more and I'd say that mission is being accomplished and in spades. It looks as if the promo is working as sales of my other books enjoyed significant gains as well.

So, thank you, one and all who glommed onto a copy! If you haven't yet, be sure and take advantage of the promo and get your free copy. Also, it helps if you click on the "Like" button and if you could take the time to post a review (hopefully a good one...), that really helps also.

Hope that everyone who got a copy enjoys the read and will want to read more of my work.

Blue skies,
Les

FREEBIE!

2012-01-19T12:12:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

FREEEEEEEEE!!!!

My publisher, StoneGate Ink is offering one of my recent novels, JUST LIKE THAT, as a free download for two days, this Saturday and Sunday. Get it at http://www.amazon.com/Just-Like-That-ebook/dp/B005GHDY82/ref=tmm_kin_title_0?ie=UTF8&m=AG56TWVU5XWC2&qid=1327003731&sr=1-3 Hope you get it and hope you enjoy the read. Although it’s fiction, about 80-85% is autobiographical. (The parts that are fiction are the events in which the statute of limitations haven’t expired…) It’s based on several road trips I combined into one and gives you a realistic glimpse into my time incarcerated in Pendleton. Cathy Johns, the assistant warden at the Angola (Louisiana) prison read it and said it was the “truest account of the criminal mind” she’d ever read. I guess it should be… after all, I was a criminal for a long time…

(Paperback copies are also available at the regular price of $12.97 and may be ordered from the Amazon site at http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&field-keywords=les+edgerton&x=0&y=0)

I’ve been blessed to have gotten great reviews and blurbs for this novel from some of the brightest stars in noir and crime writing. Our of 14 Amazon reviews, 11 gave it a 5-star rating, two a 4-star rating, and one a 3-star.

Amazon Reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars Beware: ADDICTIVE READING AHEAD, January 11, 2012

By M.L. Rigdon - See all my reviews

OK, so I started this book and couldn't stop. Edgerton's ability to haul the reader into the story and minds of his characters, in this case, the criminal mentality, left me helpless to set the book down and fiercely invested in this work of fiction that feels like fact. The odd thing was that I didn't have much sympathy with the character but felt mesmerized by the train wreck about to happen. With no experience of incarceration, I can't comment on that, but do know about surviving stressful, traumatic environments on a daily basis. There comes a point where emotions must be kept at a distance in order to function. Edgerton shows what it's like to be forced into institutionalized stress 24/7, the eventual moral nonchalance, and resultant urge/addiction to do something or anything to feel again. An exciting, scary read and window into recidivism.

5.0 out of 5 stars Masterful Prison Novel Is in Top Form as Chester Himes' Writing, December 10, 2011

Ed Lynskey, "author of ASK THE DICE and THE Z... (Washington, D.C.) - See all my reviews

Les Edgerton's masterful JUST LIKE THAT is the same rich vein as the noir-miester Chester Himes' prison novel YESTERDAY WILL MAKE YOU CRY. Both authors drew upon their life experience as convicts to craft their visceral, powerful, and, most of all, honest narratives. The protagonist Jake Mayes' portrayal is based eighty percent on actual events. He's a complex man, hardboiled but racked with searing pain, especially over his femme fatale/lover Donna. I liked reading his colorful trip taken to New Orleans with his friend Bud where a strong bond is forged between the men. Hollywood and TV have gotten it all wrong about the modern U.S. prison culture. Read JUST LIKE THAT to get the real skinny. Mr. Edgerton doesn't pull any punches at debunking Tinsel Town's myths. The gritty details emerging in the inmates' daily existence behind bars will surprise you, page after page. This essential writing makes for a captivating crime fiction read.

4.0 out of 5 stars Just Like That, October 8, 2011

By shirleylou - See all my reviews

If Thelma and Louise had stayed at the bar they might have met up with the characters in Just Like That. I never dreamed I'd be rooting for protaganists who, in real life, I would studiouly avoid. Les opens up the seedier side of life with grit and humor.

Help other customers find the most helpful reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars Les near his best, September 29, 2011

By JJ Toner "JJ Toner" (Co Wicklow, IE) - See all my reviews

I loved this book. The narrative bounces along with its own in-built energy, like the engine in a 1964 Mustang that refuses to stop even after you've switched it off and trousered the key. Les throws a lot of the writing book out the window in this one, followed by large parts of the grammar primer, and yet, the voice comes across as curiously erudite. The word "if" is noticeably absent all over the place, as in "You're smart, you try and become invisible." For anyone that needs to know what prison in the USA is really like, this book is Prison USA 101. A minor gripe I had with the book was a couple of passages where he repeated himself. The one serious gripe I had was the way the narrative was set aside every now and then to educate the reader on Tinseltown prison movie BS. I would have preferred to draw my own conclusions on that score.

Still a five star book with a strong, throbbing storyline and an angry voice telling it. I learned a lot about the criminal mind. Robbers rob for the adrenaline rush much more than the financial rewards - who knew? I also learned a few new words along the way. As you'd expect from a master of the arts of noir writing, there were some wonderful turns of phrase, like "...his face as white as an Eskimo's ass" and "...you were going to go back and sit in your f***ing cell and give names to your toes"

As I drew near the end of the book I was gutted, but consoled by the fact that I have another of his books waiting on my kindle.

3.0 out of 5 stars More a prison story than a road-trip tale, September 25, 2011

By Cliff Hardy (Sydney NSW Australia) - See all my reviews

This book was promoted as a story about two ex-cons going on a road trip, well that's true in part. Most of the story deals with the prison time of the lead character, Jake Mayes, both before and after the road trip. The book is semi-autobiographical with author Les Edgerton also spending a fair chunk of his life behind bars. This gives Just Like That an incredibly authentic feel and through Jake Mayes you get a terrific insight into the workings of the criminal mind. Bad habits, bad girls and bad choices all are portrayed with a sense that trouble is not too far away and the randomness of the violence is astounding. The story is well written and moves along at a nice clip. While Jake Mayes is certainly someone you wouldn't want to get on the wrong side of you also get a good feel for the reason he is like he is, and why he is where he is.

5.0 out of 5 stars BLAM!, September 15, 2011

By Paul D Brazill (Bydgoszcz, Poland) - See all my reviews

JUST LIKE THAT has it all. Great dialogue, whipcrack scenes and meaty characters haul you along on a harboiled crime road-trip worthy of the Elmore Leonard and Joe R Lansdale. A shot to the heart as well as the head, JUST LIKE THAT is highly recommended.

4.0 out of 5 stars Uneasy time, August 22, 2011

By Mr. Gareth Price "gazza_hoho" (Stockport) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)

Les Edgerton takes incidents from his own early life and commits them to (electronic) paper with an honesty and integrity that you come across all too rarely. Just Like That starts as a buddy book & ends as a jailhouse book, the two sides weighted almost equally. It barely let's up with the action as Jake, Les' alter-ego, goes from one bad choice to another and ends up back in Pendleton jail for the failed robbery of a bar. A nasty, to put it mildly, encounter with another inmate colours the rest of the book from here as the daily grind and desperation of jail life unfolds and ends in murder.

What stood out for me was the writing style - it's written in a conversational first person tone that really draws you in and keeps you reading even though some of the events descibed are really grim. Must be the years behind the barbers chair that have honed that kind of storytelling style. Obvious comparisons here to the work of Eddie Bunker as they both cover similar terrain but Mr Edgerton throws in a welcome sense of black humour without smoothing the edges too much.

Will be checking out the rest of Mr Edgertons output (he has at least 3 more novels & a short story collection out soon)as this one hit the spot. Enjoy

5.0 stars out of 5 stars

By Sharon Z McMeel - See all my reviews

This book riveted me to my seat. Mr. Edgerton is a writer who really captures not only the details of the inner workings of a criminal mind; but the whole world of prisons and a crime spree road trip across parts of urban and rural America. My husband is really the crime fiction buff in the family, and I'm more of the Keruoac "On the Road" fan. But Mr. Edgerton's writing really had a powerful prose style that makes the reading experience a "literary" one...albeit with more violence and bloodshed than "On the Road." But I must admit I could not stop turning the pages of JUST LIKE THAT. I'm glad this was recommeded to me and I plan on reading more of this author's original and exciting work.

5.0 stars out of 5 stars

By ChloeMac13 - See all my reviews

I read Just Like That a week ago, but still don't feel I can adequately articulate how the novel moved me. As a female who mostly reads women authors with female leads, I felt a tad strange about my immediate fascination for Jake. This con was unlike anyone I knew personally or read about in other novels, and the idea of rash criminal behavior without provocation sent a chill through me. Still, night after night I broke promises to myself to read only three or four chapters. With a story that seemed surreal in its unfamiliar setting, lingo baffling as hell, yet as much fun as learning a foreign language, and testosterone practically seeping through my Kindle, I couldn't believe how easily I'd been hooked. Les did what all writers hope to do; kept this reader thinking about events and characters from the book for days. God knows I never want to find myself inside a place so dreary and dangerous, however I'm suddenly Jonesin' to read about modern day life inside a female prison.

5.0 out of 5 stars Edgerton slams another one home with Just Like That., August 16, 2011

By Karen L. Wells "Karen L. Wells" (Boca Raton, FL United States) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)
Take a walk--no--take a run on the wild side with Les Edgerton and buckle up before you start reading his high-octane novel, Just Like That. Be sure to allow enough time to finish it in one sitting--it's a can not put down novel based mostly on Edgerton's own life experiences (85%) --it is gusty, gritty and authentic. One wonders while reading what 85% of the novel is real and true? Just Like That gives the reader a lot to think about days after finishing the book. Tell a friend.

5.0 out of 5 stars

By Tom R/Scottsdale, AZ - See all my reviews

Wow, I just love the way Les writes! The title "Just Like That" is brilliant and will resonate with you on every page and upon completion of the book. The story is very raw with absolute clarity told through the criminal mind. I now look and see some folks in a completely different way. The book title "Just Like That" just became my new favorite colloquialism.

5.0 out of 5 stars

By Susanne Schuster - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)

We start with a picaresque tale of a couple of ex-cons hitting the road and end with the un-picaresque tale of buddies back in the pen. For visceral excitement, JUST LIKE THAT is nothing short of Elmore Leonard. For True Crime Fiction--well there's nothing to compare it to. You'll not only get involved on an elemental level with the real-life con characters and their real-life criminal action, but you'll learn why everything you've seen on the small or the big screen about criminals, courts, and penitentiaries is as about as genuine as a politician's smile. An exciting read and a handbook to the inside conveyed in first-rate writing. Spell that w-i-n-n-e-r.

5.0 out of 5 stars A must read and watch out - Les is going for it on this one., August 14, 2011

By Sarah Faurote - See all my reviews

The great thing about Just Like That is the language. The feel. Les Edgerton is a master of words. Like Albert Camus, he describes a killing in short, simple language that carries a blow to the mind. This is a creation of visual travel. Read Just Like That and you may wonder if you wake up to the sound of bars locking shut. Read on. Go Go Go!

5.0 out of 5 stars A writer at the top of his game, August 9, 2011

By Eddie Vega (Brooklyn, NY) - See all my reviews

Ex-felon Les Edgerton knows the internal workings of the criminal mind, and with lean muscular prose he has written a book about it. While there are many qualities that make this book worth reading -- certainly the writing itself, which is excellent throughout, and the plot which moves with the kick of a 45 cal. bullet, -- what I most appreciated was its effort in coming to terms with the most perplexing of evils, those spur of the moment just-like-that crimes not motivated by necessity or reason but by some primal source that gives the lie to the perfectibility of mankind.

Hope lots of you take advantage of the two-day freebie! If you like it, I’d really appreciate your posting a short review on Amazon and if you hit the “Like” button, I’m told that helps also. Also, if you enjoy the read, please check out my other titles, including THE PERFECT CRIME and THE BITCH. Coming soon is my collection of short stories, GUMBO YA-YA, from Snubnose Press.

Blue skies,

Les

P.S. Check out Helen Ginger’s interview on Inspiration Forum. She graciously gives me several shout-outs for which I’m grateful. You can read it at http://www.inspirationforum.co.uk/showthread.php?tid=2167

GUMBO YA-YA

2012-01-12T06:53:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

I'm still glowing from the Best Thriller Award from the Preditors and Editors poll! Again, thank you, each and every one who voted and got your pals to vote--what you did for me was the real award.

And... it doesn't stop. I was just informed by Brian Lindenmuth, my editor at Snubnose Press, that my short story collection, GUMBO YA-YA, will be released within the next couple of weeks. He told me I could show y'all the cover... which I LOVE!

Here it tis...

I love it!

Watch for it--I'll be announcing it the instant it becomes available.

The title came about in the same manner as did the title for my first collection MONDAY'S MEAL. There are a couple of requirements traditionally for short story collections. One, at least half should have been previously published in prestigious literary magazines. This collection satisfies that requirement as all but a couple were published in such venues as High Plains Literary Review, Houghton-Mifflin's Best American Mystery Stories, Murdaland Magazine, The Analecta, Blue Moon Literary and Art Review Magazine, Imaginary Friends Anthology, Flatmancrooked, Aethlon, Noir Nation International Crime Magazine, On The Record anthology, and an essay in it was published in Circle K Magazine. A couple of the stories were nominated for the Pushcart Award and Edgar Allan Poe (short story category) Awards. So, that requirement was satisfied. Although, increasingly, collections aren't requiring prior publication as much these days.

Two, short story collections are traditionally supposed to be centered around a theme.

Which was a problem with MONDAY'S MEAL and I faced the same problem with this one. There just isn't a theme in either collection. And publishers decided a long time ago that readers wanted to know what the stories were about. They didn’t feel readers would buy otherwise. If the reader was into crime or noir, they wanted the stories in a collection to be about… crime or noir. If they wanted to read tales about romance, they wanted to know that’s what they were buying. If they wanted horror… well, you get the picture. The problem was in MONDAY’S MEAL was that the stories included in it were kind of all over the map. No “theme” involved. Just stories. So I came up with what I felt was the perfect solution. I titled it MONDAY’S MEAL.

In the South, where I grew up, Monday was traditionally washday. In my youth (back when dinosaurs first went on the endangered list) Monday was the day when the wife took care of her brood of children, did the week’s wash, cleaned the house, did a host of other chores, and still prepared a hearty meal for supper. Because of time constraints, that was the day most women prepared a stew or, where I lived, on the Texas Gulf Coast, a gumbo. It was the perfect meal for Mondays, because the woman could run in whenever she had a spare moment or two, throw in an ingredient, and go back out and hang out another load on the clothesline and yell at the kids for fighting amongst themselves. What happened was a lot of ingredients went into it—ingredients that, upon first glance, looked unrelated and even questionable as to how they’d work together—but in the end, when she ladled it out to her husband and kids, turned out to be a delicious combination.

And that was how and why that collection came up with its name.

I faced the same problem with this collection. Stories without a theme. This time, the answer came to me much quicker. I grew up in a bar and seafood restaurant in Freeport, Texas. My grandmother, who owned the business, had a wood stove she reserved for one dish only. Gumbo. Only Yankees cook gumbo on electric or gas stoves. True Southerners use wood stoves. And Grandma Louise Vincent was, if anything, a “true Southerner.” In fact, she wouldn’t serve a Yankee in her establishment. Kick ‘em right out. Some who were booted threatened to go to the law as their civil rights were being violated and she told them to go right ahead. It wasn’t a problem for her as the county sheriff was a daily customer… And didn't care much for Yankees either...

She had a real problem when her daughter—my mother—married a Yankee, but that’s another story…

Anyway, nowadays if you go into a restaurant that serves gumbo, it’ll reflect a theme, same as short story collections. “Shrimp” gumbo. “Okra” gumbo. “Crab” gumbo. “Crawfish” gumbo. (Or, as we called it, “Mudbug Gumbo.”) Whatever. In our restaurant, Grandma Vincent made the same kind of gumbo most oldtimers made. A concoction we called “Gumbo Ya-Ya.” It had different ingredients in it, depending on the season and depending on the availability of ingredients. Ingredients, that when considered separately, didn’t always appear to be compatible. But… they were. Once cooked together, the meal ended up absolutely delicious.

My own favorite ingredient—in season—was crab eggs. I absolutely love the orange, gummy texture and flavor of crab eggs. Probably an ingredient that Yankees would turn their delicate noses up at…
Anyway, that’s how this collection of stories got its name. Thought you might be interested in the genesis of the title.

And, I really hope you like the stories in it! There’s a bit of a bonus. Besides the stories, there is an essay I’m very proud of, titled “Censorship and Why I Love Charles Bukowski.” This essay has a history. I wrote it as my graduating address for my MFA degree at Vermont College and delivered it to the single largest crowd at graduation in their history, according to Pam Painter, well-known author and one of my advisors, who’d been on the faculty since the program began. It was later published in Circle K Magazine. In it, I rail against what was a new phenomenon at the time—a concept called “political correctness.” At the time, I saw it as one of the biggest threats against freedom of speech ever propagated. Today, more than 15 years later I see it as… the same thing.

There’s also a bit from a memoir I’m still writing on that I think folks will enjoy. It’s centered around my son Mike and me when he was a little guy and I was coaching his youth baseball league team.

Anyway, I’m pumped up that Snubnose Press has seen fit to publish this work. Just a few years ago, it had become increasingly difficult to get a collection published. Most publishers wouldn’t touch ‘em for a simple reason. Sales usually didn’t justify the publishing expense. Thanks to ebooks, that’s changing. And, that’s a good thing, in my mind.

I hope you’ll agree.

Blue skies,
Les

P.S. Here's a hint for Yankees attempting to cook their first gumbo. Well, two hints. First... you make a roue. Many otherwise good cooks can't make a roue. My mother can't and she's a born and bred Southerner. I'm proud to say that I make a great roue! Second, and most importantly--never put your spices in until just before it's done cooking. Otherwise, all the flavor "cooks up" and you'll be left with a tasteless, bland meal. Just sayin'...

And, if you can glom onto crab eggs, throw 'em in...

WE WON!

2012-01-11T13:39:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

This is one of the happiest posts I’ve ever had the pleasure of writing! It looks like… drum roll, please…

WE’VE WON THE PREDITORS and EDITORS POLL FOR BEST THRILLER OF 2011!!! THE WINNER IS…. THE BITCH!!!

You can see the results here: http://critters.org/predpoll/tally_novelthrill.ht

Who do I start thanking? To be honest, the list is too long and this site will crash if I were even able to name everybody who voted or worked on my behalf to secure votes. There were people literally working to get more votes and keep my novel in first place right up until the very end at midnight last night!

But, even though there’s no way I can possibly name each individual, I do want to give a particular shoutout to one group of people. My online novel writing class. Two nights ago when, after being in first place for nine days, it slipped to second, I notified one group that night before I went to bed--my class—the Boot Camp for Writers group. When I woke the next morning and went in to check where it was at… we were back in first place!

You guys rock and I love you!

As I do everybody else who took the time and the trouble to not only vote for THE BITCH, but asked friends and relatives to do so as well. I cannot begin to tell you how much your efforts on my behalf have meant to me. I will say this—even if I had lost, I would have felt like the biggest winner in the world for what you did for me.

In fact, before I checked the standings this morning, I thought about all the people who had given up their time and went to the trouble they did and I realized then that, win or lose, I had won. Finding out THE BITCH had ended up the winner in the poll was just icing on the cake. I’m ecstatic it won, but I’m much more happy at what y’all did for me. I haven’t the words to say that can adequately express my appreciation so I’ll just say… THANK YOU.

There were literally dozens of other writers who helped me out with their tweets and mentions on Facebook and on their blogs—I owe you folks! For people who think about and write about noir and murder and crime all day, there’s an awful lot of love among this group. I’m glad we’re all in the same foxhole with each other and have each others' backs.

One guy in particular I need to single out. Anthony Neil Smith. Neil and I both had novels in this horserace and he threw his support to me. What kind of tough, brilliant writer does that? The kind that not only writes with grace, but practices it in his daily life.

THE BITCH is also gathering all kinds of rave reviews which is so gratifying. I feel this is the best book I’ve ever written, but as we all know as writers, the success of a writer’s effort is never really known until the readers have been heard from. And, the reviews and comments have been simply fantastic. Thank you, each and every one! I’m so glad you liked it. This is the real payment for the effort we as writers expend.

You can go here http://www.amazon.com/The-Bitch-ebook/dp/B006P2NLHG/ref=sr_1_1_title_0_main?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1324588756&sr=1-1 to see those reviews.

I also owe a couple of people an enormous debt. My publishers at Bare Knuckle Press, Cort McMeel and Eddie Vega. If it weren’t for them and their belief in this novel, none of this would have been possible. Thanks, guys!

I’m going to go collapse in a hot tub and savor this. At my age, champagne and riotous nights are a thing of the past, but I guarantee you I’m going to enjoy that tub!

I love you folks.

Blue skies,

Les

Preview

FAMED CHEF GORDON RAMSEY HOLDS THE BEST WRITING CLASSES EVER!

2012-01-10T10:44:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

Did I surprise you with the title of today’s post? I imagine so! After all, I suspect most who read this and are writers weren’t aware that Scotland’s Chef Gordon Ramsey taught writing. Most probably believe he’s involved in great cooking, right?

Well, he does, but the lessons and more importantly—the philosophy—he teaches on his shows are spot on for writers who want to be the best they can be.

Every single morning I have his shows on the BBC channel on. I’d rather watch them than read most writer’s how-to books or go to writer’s conventions and workshops. I learn everything I need to know about writing from this man.

Watch him as he turns around a failing or struggling restaurant. Begin with a mindset—that everything he imparts about cooking be considered as him talking about writing.

The principles he espouses for being a great chef or restaurateur are exactly the same principles required for a writer to not only be published but to be respected as a good or even great writer.

He never bullshits. He never sugarcoats his take on the chef’s performance and output. Never. He doesn’t tolerate laziness. He doesn’t tolerate stupidity when the person he’s critiquing clearly isn’t stupid but is just performing stupidly. Which is only… laziness.

He doesn’t tolerate alibis. He doesn’t tolerate assigning blame to others. He insists the person man up and face his own faults and correct them. He has no patience for those who feel they’re “entitled” to success. He insists that the only way to gain success is to earn it by their performance.

He doesn’t tolerate those who believe their failures are caused by others, or by fate or bad luck.

He knows that if you think you’re doing someone a kindness by not being honest with their effort, you’re delivering the greatest unkindness of all.

He doesn’t mollycoddle anyone—ever.

Look at how he approaches each person he tries to help. First, he’s brutally honest with them. If their product is shit, he lets them know it’s shit.

He doesn’t tell them to be something they’re not or that they’re incapable of being. He doesn’t tell a chef who’s great at cooking steaks to begin cooking French cuisine. He simply tells them to begin cooking steaks well. To build on what they already have mastered and have ignored.

Look at those who blame their patrons for not being successful. He doesn’t have much use for those folks. Kind of like the writer blaming the agents and editors for their lack of success. He has the same kind of patience (none) for that attitude that I do with my own students. It’s bullshit. If the writer is putting out quality work, do they really believe that agents and editors are not rushing to represent them because they have something personal against the writer? That’s so ludicrous it’s beyond funny. Any and all agents and editors want to find quality work. It’s what pays their bills, allows them to live in nice places, eat in great restaurants. If the work is shit, or even “average” who can work with that? The answer is obvious: nobody. Nobody can work with crap, any more than a chef can work with inferior ingredients or shoddy cooking techniques.

I see writers all the time ranting against the “injustice” of the publishing industry and system. It’s always somebody else’s fault that Superstar Agent isn’t interested in their work. It’s always the Big Shot Editor’s fault that their work is rejected. It’s never their fault. It’s never that the product is crap. Those writers’ egos can’t seem to accept that what they put out is lousy. They’re just convinced that the only thing keeping them from being published is that their “genius” isn’t being recognized. Okay…

But, just like Ramsey’s clients, that’s almost always the cause of writers’ failure. The ones who won’t admit that to themselves or look for excuses for their lack of success in others, will never make it. That’s just the truth. Sadly, far too many have self-deluded themselves into looking anywhere but the right place for the answers to their failure. The right place to look is in the mirror. If a writer can’t do that, he or she will never be successful. If that writer who rants about the “unfairness” of it all spent half the time they do on railing about life’s inequities on working to become a better writer… they would.

The way Gordon Ramsey approaches his clients is exactly the way I approach my students and clients. With the truth. If the work is shit, they need to know it’s shit. You can’t change manure into roses if you don’t know it’s crap. Once you realize your work isn’t good, that’s the beginning of wisdom. That’s when the work has a chance of getting better. Of becoming publishable.

My classes aren't labeled "Lots of Praise and Handholding for Wannabe Writers." They called "Les Edgerton's Boot Camp for Writers." There's a reason for that. We're interested in turning out publishable writers, not much interested in stroking egos.

Take a look at Ramsey’s show. Substitute the word writer for chef. Look at what he’s telling each failing chef. Imagine he’s telling you the same things as a writer. They all apply.

Here’s an apt example. I have a writer who’s been taking my classes for a year and a half. In her first class, she didn’t get beyond the first five pages of her beginning… FOR NINE WEEKS. Nine weeks. To come up with a proper novel beginning, one that began where it should, with the inciting incident. Others have taken many weeks to do so (my students call it “inciting incident hell.”). They’re right. It is hell. But, this student didn’t give up. She never blamed others. She just kept working… and working… and working. And, after nine weeks, she was given the okay to move past her first five pages. Today, a year and a half later, just this week I recommended her to an agent and a publisher. I’m pretty sure both will take her novel on. Even if they don’t, someone else will. She’s written a brilliant novel. Has it been hard? Absolutely! Anything worth doing requires work and hard work.

Could she have written a novel in a year and a half without going through “inciting incident hell” first? Sure. Would it have been publishable? I doubt it. I’m pretty sure she’d agree with that. It's the lessons she learned in achieving a great beginning that she understands allowed her to write every page after that well.

Finishing a novel is sometimes overrated. A chef can finish cooking a steak, but does that mean it’s a great steak and will bring the diner back? The only thing that matters is that the work be excellent. Nobody pays for “half good.” No matter how cheaply you price it.

Has it been worth it to her? You’ll have to ask her, but I’m pretty sure she’d answer in the affirmative and loudly so. And, I suspect she, like many others who’ve taken my classes and survived, would voice the same kinds of sentiments that Chef Ramsey’s clients who succeed do.

The point is, watch Chef Ramsey’s show as he works to transform attitudes. What he says is spot on what any decent teacher will tell you about your writing. Try to listen instead of waiting until they’re done talking to tell them why publishing is unfair to their genius…

Sorry if this offends some. Actually, I’m not sorry. Any writing—even a blog—that everyone likes and agrees with is… crapola writing. All writing should affect the reader’s emotions—positive or negative. Doesn’t much matter. If this post offends some people and it angers them enough to go out and prove me wrong, then it’s valuable. If it re-energizes some writers into redoubling their efforts at quality writing, it’s valuable. If it causes some writers to look into the mirror and admit their lack of success is due only to the person staring back at them and they make the decision to change what they’re doing, it’s valuable.

How can you tell if you have enough talent to succeed as a writer? That's easy. The same way Chef Ramsey can tell if the chef he's working with can rise from his failures. If he can cook a single dish that's excellent, he has the chops to be a good or great chef. Same thing with writers. If you can write a single paragraph or single sentence that's excellent, you have the chops to be a good or great writer. What's needed is the same for Chef Ramsey's students--all of the entrees need to be equally good. If you can write a great sentence, you have the ability you need to succeed. The thing is, you have to do the hard work to bring all of your sentences up to the same quality. That's called... hard work.

Personally, I want every single person writing to succeed. I just know some won’t. I also know why they won’t. The sad thing is, they don’t.

Watch Chef Ramsey and take in the lessons. You’ll be glad you did.

Blue skies,

Les

P.S. For those who aren't pissed at what I said, and you're reading this on the 10th, I can still use your vote as per the posting just before this one. Thank you.

NEED YOUR HELP!

2012-01-10T06:54:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

For nine days, my new novel, THE BITCH has been #1 in the Preditors and Editors Thriller Category Awards. With the last day of voting today, every day I watched the standings nervously, especially as other novels moved up. There’s no way of knowing if I had a big lead or a tiny one, but it was still there.

Until last night. Last night, I took my wife Mary out for her birthday dinner, along with our son Mike and his girlfriend Chelsea. When we got home, I did as always and checked the list.

THE BITCH had slipped to second place…

I went to bed as low as I’ve been in a long time. So close…

But, my students at the online class I teach got together and began asking their friends and family to vote (it’s one vote per email address so you can’t stuff the ballot box, which is a good thing). I know it was because of their effort as they were the only ones I notified before I went to bed. I’d planned today to post this on the blog and FB and see if we could make a comeback.

My class people are the folks I want to be in the foxhole with!

I know many of you have been there with me as well. I can’t begin to tell you how much your loyalty means to me!

Well, this ayem I got up and checked the standings… and we’re back in first place! I know it’s tenuous and may not hold—the person in second is undoubtedly rallying his troops and doing everything he can to pass me again. So I’m making one more plea for your help.

If you haven’t voted yet or if you have friends or relatives you don’t mind asking for their vote, here’s what you do.

Go to the P&E polling site at http://critters.org/predpoll/novelthrill.shtml

Scroll down until you see The Bitch by Les Edgerton and click on the box at it. Scroll down further and enter your name and email address. Scroll down more and enter the two security words and then submit your vote. You’ll get an email then from them and in it is a link you just click on and it takes you back to their site and informs you your vote has counted.

That’s it.

Voting ends today—not sure what time it ends—so if you can take a few minutes to help me out it would be hugely… and I mean HUGELY appreciated!

Now. I’m going to go to a dark room, pull a blanket over my head and not come out until midnight. The suspense is killing me!

Thank you, each and every one of you who did me this immense favor. I owe ya!

Blue skies,

Les

CLASS FILLED--THANK YOU!

2012-01-06T07:53:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

Thanks to your tremendous response, we've filled all the available spots in the upcoming Boot Camp for Writers class. If anyone is interested in auditing, those spots are unlimited and still available. If interested in auditing, please email me at butchedgerton@comcast.net.

I appreciate the rapid responses. If anyone is interested in the next class (in about 20 weeks) just let me know and I'll put you on the list and contact you at that time to see if you're still interested.

And, please vote for THE BITCH on the Preditors and Editors thriller awards. Four days left in the voting and so far I'm still in first place but who knows what the other contenders are up to! Just go to http://critters.org/predpoll/novelthrill.shtml and click on my novel. And... THANKS!

Also, Thomas Pluck just posted a terrific review (from my point-of-view!) of THE BITCH on his blog. Check it out at

http://www.pluckyoutoo.com/2012/01/review-bitch.html

And, finally, my publisher, Bare Knuckles Press, has its website up and running. Check it out at:

www.bareknucklespress.com

Blue skies,
Les

SPOTS OPEN IN MY ONLINE WRITING CLASS

2012-01-05T16:46:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

My next online novel-writing class is scheduled to begin on Sunday, January 22, and we have two spots left if anyone's interested. It's conducted in a workshop structure where classmates send ten pages of their novel in each week and each member of the class comments on each other's work and I do also. The energy in class is contagious and each writer is extremely dedicated. Kind of intense--in fact, it's labeled "Les Edgerton's Boot Camp Class" and it is. This isn't a class for anyone who just wants praise--actually, all praise has to be earned. It's a class for people who have thick skins and only want to end up with a publishable novel and not have their egos stroked. Those who decide to join us will soon experience an incredible synergy not often obtained in such classes.

Several who will be taking the coming class have been with me for several classes--although there are a few who entered the class for the first time last session and we have some newcomers this time. The folks there are very supportive of new classmates and it's a genuinely giving atmosphere.

The class takes 16 weeks and usually we'll "hit the wall" a bit sometime during the term and take a week off. The fee is #350 (nonrefundable) and it can be paid prior to class, or it can also be paid in three installments of #125 each for a total of #375 for those paying in installments.

Several in the class have told me they'll be posting information about their experiences in the comments section here. If interested, please let me know asap. We only have two slots remaining and experience shows they'll fill fast. Please email me at butchedgerton@comcast.net.

If anyone is interested in auditing the class, the fee for auditing is #100. Auditors will have complete access to everything we do in class but won't have their work critiqued or contribute to the discussion. We can allow as many auditors as are interested.

Several of the writers in the last class are very close to finishing their novels and each one is very publishable. In fact, one writer is within just a few days of having her novel read by my agent and others and a publisher. She's applying the final polish to it and out the door it goes! Several others will finish theirs during the next class and will be sending it out.

Hope to see you in class!

Blue skies,
Les

P.S. On another note, my novel THE BITCH is still in first place in the Preditors and Editors thriller category, but voting is still going on and will be until the 10th. A couple of folks are moving up fast, so if you haven't voted, I'd really appreciate it. Just go to http://critters.org/predpoll/novelthrill.shtml and click on my novel. And... THANKS!

Paul D Brazill's You Would Say That, Wouldn't You?: Short Sharp Interview: Les Edgerton

2012-01-02T11:09:00.000-08:00

I'm over at noir master Paul D. Brazill's blog today, lying to him... It was fun!

Paul D Brazill's You Would Say That, Wouldn't You?: Short Sharp Interview: Les Edgerton

FIRST PLACE!

2011-12-30T07:40:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

Woke up this ayem and checked the Preditors and Editors competiiton and... THE BITCH is now Number One! All the credit goes to the fantastic folks here and other friends who took the time and trouble to vote for it. I'm in deep debt and gratitude to you. It's not over yet--I imagine others will mount a big push, so if you haven't voted yet or can ask your friends to vote, we'll win this puppy!

For the Preditors and Editors (and Preditors is misspelled on purpose by the founders of the site), go here to vote. It's under Thrillers. http://critters.org/predpoll/novelthrill.shtml

For those who want to vote in the Spinetingler's awards, go here: http://www.spinetinglermag.com/ That link takes you to the article about the awards. Click on "More" and at the poll, scroll down to Legends (folks with more than 9 books published) and write in The Bitch by Les Edgerton in the box. That's it.

And... THANK YOU ONE AND ALL!

Blue skies,
Les

MOVING UP! THANK YOU!!!

2011-12-29T17:10:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,
Thanks to y'all, THE BITCH is now in second place in the P&E Awards! Keep it going, please! Ask your friends if they'd help if you don't mind. We're really, really close! Don't know how to tell how we're doing in the Spinetingler Awards but think we're doing okay.

Here are the links again:

http://www.spinetinglermag.com/

http://critters.org/predpoll/novelthrill.shtml

And, for those who haven’t had a chance to buy the book and want to, go here:

http://www.amazon.com/The-Bitch-ebook/dp/B006P2NLHG/ref=sr_1_1_title_0_main?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1324588756&sr=1-1

Some have said they didn't know where to vote on the Spinetingler site. Just click on the link on the lead article and then go to Legends in the thriller category. I'm a legend since I've had more than 8 books published. This is flat-out amazing, as all the other books have been out for a long time and mine less than a week. That means it's YOU FOLKS who are making this happen! I love ya and am having you all over to my place for drinks if we win!

Thank you!

Blue skies,
Les

Help!

2011-12-29T13:44:00.000-08:00

HI folks,

I just learned my new novel, THE BITCH, is currently in fifth place in the Predators and Critter's Best Of poll. You can vote at http://critters.org/predpoll/novelthrill.shtml

There are some REALLY good novels listed. Personally, I voted for Anthony Neil Smith's book, and there were several others I wish I could have voted for also. But... if ya love me, you'll vote for...

I'd appreciate your taking the time and trouble! If I do well, I'm taking everybody here out for drinks. (I'm just taking you out... not buying.

Blue skies,
Les

INTERVIEW AT INSPIRATION FORUM

2011-12-27T09:32:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

I just completed one of the most fun interviews I've ever had the pleasure of participating in over at the Inspiration Forum from the U.K. You can see it at: http://www.inspirationforum.co.uk/showthread.php?tid=1790

Paul D. Brazill recommended me to Fiona, the interviewer and her questions were spot-on. Thanks, Paul--you were right--Fiona's da bomb!

Hope you enjoy it--I sure did!

Blue skies,
Les

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!

2011-12-25T07:40:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

Merry Christmas! I hope everyone arrived safe and sound at Grandma's house and is enjoying a great meal and fellowship. And... I hope in everyone's stocking they found a new Kindle.

Which means you need stuff to fill it with...

Here's a few ideas http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&field-keywords=les+edgerton&x=0&y=0

There's no snow! Yay!

Happy writing for next year! My wish for all my writing friends is that they publish everything they write! And, for my reading friends, that they love every book they read.

Blue skies,
Les

THE BITCH IS FOR SALE!!!

2011-12-22T13:12:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

THE BITCH JUST WENT ON SALE AT AMAZON!!!

Go to http://www.amazon.com/The-Bitch-ebook/dp/B006P2NLHG/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1324588026&sr=1-1

Hope you like it! I'm extremely proud of this book--put everything I had into it!

If you go to Amazon, please take a second and hit the "Like" button. Also, if anyone will leave a review, I'll put you in my will...

Blue skies,
Les

THE BITCH is coming! Promise...

2011-12-21T11:41:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

I know at least some of you are awaiting publication of my psychological thriller, THE BITCH, and I just wanted to give you an update on it.

The holdup is due entirely to the publisher, Eddie Vega. Lest you think I just threw Eddie under the bus, allow me to explain.

The whole problem is, Eddie's a perfectionist. Definitely a guy who's out of touch with modern life! Who in contemporary publishing does what this guy does! And, what is it he does, exactly?

Well, if you’ve read many ebooks, you’ve no doubt encountered a number of glitches in at least some of them. Paragraphs separated by space breaks, ala Lorrie Moore… but not on purpose as her work is. Those little wing-dings that mysteriously appear, such as the little blank boxes that sometimes show up. Paragraphs that aren’t indented. Spelling errors, punctuation mistakes, lines split mysteriously in places that don’t make sense. Dozens of other glitches.

Those who’ve published ebooks are well aware of them. The best publishers try to eliminate as many as possible. They appear because of the conversion programs available. What goes into the wood-chipper of a conversion program isn’t necessarily what comes out. While the best publishers do their best to clean up and eliminate conversion errors, there are some who could care less. Just slap it up on Amazon and fuggetaboutit. Some of these publishers just don’t give a damn. Slap it through the program and get it out there…

Not Eddie, nor Cort McMeel, the publishers of Bare Knuckles Press and Noir Nation International Crime Magazine. These guys are just plain anal. They have this ridiculous notion that what the buyer sees on his/her Kindle or Nook or other e-reader should be nothing less than perfect and that nothing on the page detract from the reading experience.

Here’s an encapsulated history of the editing of this book. First, I went through at least three major edits and rewrites of the entire manuscript under the guidance and tutelage of Cort and Eddie. Several dozen additional minor rewrites. This was before it was sent out for the ebook conversion process.

Eddie worked with the artists and technical wizards of the brilliant firm of Hurricanes and Butterflies in Prague, both for the cover and for the conversion to ebook format. He spent literally weeks just on the cover. Not to mention spending a boatload of money on it! This wasn’t some cover art from Jim Bob at the local graphic shop. He wanted the perfect cover. And got it, at least in my opinion. Oh—and that’s another thing. While most publishers I’ve worked with have been very gracious in soliciting my opinion about the cover on my books, not all do so. These guys really care that the author likes his cover.

For the past month, Eddie has had the three of us—him, Cort and me--going over and over the converted manuscript. Three times we’ve gone over and over a new version. Each time, we found and ferreted out conversion errors and my own errors.

Eddie and Cort have literally been working on manuscripts for BKP for 20-hour days, seven days a week. For months and months. They only publish books they’re passionate about and they’ve treated my manuscript with more respect and loving care than I’ve ever experienced with any other publisher, including several of the Big Six legacy publishers.

I’ve had to turn my phone off at night to get any sleep. Eddie is a vampire and if I didn’t turn off my phone, I’d be sure to get a call from him at three in the ayem. He often works through the night and I think he thinks the rest of us are doing the same.

The thing is, both Eddie and Cort feel this is a great book. And, they treat it with that kind of respect. Whether it is or not, I imagine readers will let us know. I’m very happy with it—especially after these guys helped me make it much “gooder” than it was when I submitted it to them.

I wish all my writer friends will get to experience a publishing experience akin to mine with Bare Knuckles Press with their own publishers! It’s the kind of experience that renews my faith in publishers—the kind that used to exist in larger numbers. Who aren’t concerned about the money first and foremost, but more in delivering what they feel to be worthwhile literature to the world.

So, I’m not throwing Eddie under the bus at all. Mostly, I love the respect and care he’s given my work, even if it gets the release date moved up some.

At this moment, we’re hoping it’ll be available in a day or so. In the meantime, I just wanted those of you who’ve been asking me when they can get a copy to know what’s going on. It’s all good.

I also wanted to share with you what some folks have said about THE BITCH in the blurbs they’ve generously given to me. As you can see by their names, these are people most of us know from their own, superb work. It means a lot to me what they had to say.

BLURBS

THE BITCH is the kind of raw crime fiction that’s right up my alley, like sandpaper for the brain. Edgerton has got the chops. Mad chops. Gonna make us all ashamed of our puny efforts one day.

—Anthony Neil Smith, bestselling author of All the Young Warriors, Choke on Your Lies, Psychomatic, Hogdoggin’, Yellow Medicine, The Drummer, To the Devil, My Regards, Devil Red (Hap and Leonard) and others.

The Bitch is a vicious barnstormer of a novel, a noir rollercoaster that won’t let you unbuckle until that final three-word smackdown. Les Edgerton is Eddie Bunker’s pulpy cousin and Eugene Izzi’s soul brother, and with a spiritual family like that, you can’t go wrong. Pick it up immediately.

—Ray Banks, internationally bestselling author of Dead Money, Beast of Burden, The Big Blind. Saturday’s Child, Donkey Punch, No More Heroes and others.

Les Edgerton doesn’t pussyfoot around. He writes about real people drowning in desperation in THE BITCH. He’s got a story to tell you so get ready; it’s coming at you fast. Get ready…

—Linwood Barclay, international bestselling author of Never Look Away, Clouded Vision, The Last Resort, Fear the Worst, Too Close to Home, No Time for Goodbye, The Accident and others.

Les Edgerton’s brilliantly hardboiled THE BITCH is the tense and hard hitting story of Jake Bishop, a reformed ex-con whose dark past drags him back into a life of crime like an umbilical cord tied tight around his neck.

—Paul D. Brazill, author of 13 Shots of Noir.

I liked THE BITCH so much that I wanted to publish it. But we lost out and Bare Knuckles Press got a hell of a book. The Bitch is a dark crime fiction story that never once pulls a punch or ducks behind some bullshit like “happy endings” or “closure.” The Bitch isn’t afraid to stay dark until the very end.

—Brian Lindenmuth, editor/publisher of Snubnose Press and Spinetingler Magazine.

From its opening sentence to its last, THE BITCH is an engrossing journey into some very dark places. Les Edgerton writes like a poet with a mean streak, and his prose goes down easy and smooth like good liquor as it carves up your insides.

—Henry Perez, author of Mourn the Living and Killing Red.

Imagine, if you will, Les Edgerton, Dashiell Hammett and Raymond Chandler sipping straight whiskey while swapping lies in the back booth of the Linebacker bar as the “noir” legends welcome Edgerton into the brotherhood of broken dreams. With THE BITCH, Edgerton earns his way into this special literary brotherhood. No, The Bitch isn’t a wild woman, but prison slang for “ha-BITCH-ual criminal.” This is a taut tale of double-cross, death, diamonds and destruction as Jake Bishop fights to protect all he holds dear—his freedom, his pregnant wife, and his teen-age brother—by holding The Bitch at bay when trapped into one last job. Sam Spade and Phillip Marlowe could learn a thing or two from this hairdresser.

—Bob Stewart, author of Remorse (Pinnacle) a True Crime Book of the Month selection, Hidden Evil, and others.

Les Edgerton. I just read his newest hard-boiled effort, THE BITCH, and I realized I didn’t once breathe through the entire thing. Okay, that’s an exaggeration, but it is one of the most fun, dangerous, if not pyromaniac literary performances of the past year (word up is that parts of it are taken from Les’s own life. Holy crap, this guy shouldn’t be alive!). Like Les’s previous bestselling nonfiction effort on writing, HOOKED, this novel is a sure bet.

—Vincent Zandri author of The Remains, The Innocent, Moonlight Falls and The Concrete Pearl.

Every crime novelist remembers how his breath was literally taken away when he first started to read the early novels of Elmore Leonard. Les Edgerton has used the time he served in prison well. Years from now many future crime writers will also remember discovering him. His first crime novel, but not his first published book, THE BITCH is a realistic crime noir kind of novel that reminds me of Unknown Man 89, La Brava, Stick, and The Killer Inside Me (Jim Thompson).

—Joseph Trigoboff, author of The Bone Orchard and The Shooting Gallery.

And then, there’s this!

Paul D. Brazill and Luca Veste both named THE BITCH on their lists of top novels of 2011.

It just doesn’t get any better than this. At least not for me! Watch this space for the announcement of its availability.

Blue skies,

Les

Paul D. Brazill names THE BITCH as one of his top crime novels of 2011!

2011-12-20T09:34:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

I am beside myself. Speechless. Humbled. Hugely honored. Did I mention speechless?

The reason is, noir master Paul D. Brazill just named THE BITCH as one of his choices for the top crime novels of 2011. We're racing to get it out and it should be out within a week.

But... Paul D. Brazill! Now I know how Moses felt when God reached down and touched off the burning bush... Sorry to be sacriligious... well, no, I'm not... maybe a little... but we're talking about PAUL D. BRAZILL!

You can see it here http://pdbrazill.blogspot.com/

I also know how Scarlett O'Hara felt when she got the vapors. I've got 'em right now.

This has got to be the best Christmas present I've ever received!

Thank you, Mr. Brazill!

Blue skies,
Les

TWO HUGE HONORS!

2011-12-15T11:46:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,
I had to go back and edit the original post I just placed on here. I had originally talked about being honored by noir god Paul D. Brazill when he picked one of my short stories as on of the best of the year... and, then I stumbled upon another huge honor I wasn't even aware of--Luca Veste had named my new novel, THE BITCH as one his picks for top novels of the year! I don't know how I missed that! Anyway, the write-up is over at Luca's blog at http://www.lucaveste.com/

I am just in seventh heaven! Thank you so, so much, Luca and Paul!

Death by Killing: Five You Can't Miss: Paul D. Brazill: Paul D. Brazill is a funny guy, a great writer, and one of the best promoters in the biz. He's responsible for the Drunk on the Moon series ...

THIS WAS JUST POSTED IN CHRIS RHATIGAN'S BLOG, DEATH BY KILLING.

Hi folks,

I had to sit down when I read this blog and catch my breath. Seriously. In it, Paul D. Brazill names my short story, "Pit Stop" which appeared in Noir Nation, as one of his picks for The Top Five Short Stories of 2011."

From PAUL D. BRAZILL! Those of you who know me know I consider Paul one of the true gods of noir. To have him honor me in this way means more to me than winning just about any award out there. I am totally speechless and beside myself.

Thank you, Mr. Brazill!

Blue skies,
Les

RADIO SHOW--GIOVANNI GELATI'S THE G-SPOT

2011-12-14T14:56:00.000-08:00

HI folks,

Didn't have time to send out an alert, but just participated in an interview on Gio Gelati's radio blog, The G-Spot, along with author B.R. Stateham. If interested in hearing my dulcet tones, go to http://www.blogtalkradio.com/gelatisscoop/2011/12/14/two-best-selling-authorsbrstateham-paul-d-brazill

Paul D. Brazill was scheduled to appear, but he had problems connecting with his phone from his home in Poland. (I'll let an amateur handle any Polish jokes... I have far too much respect to do something like that...)

Anyway, we had a cool conversation about writing and publishing you may enjoy. B.R. Stateham writes some kick-butt novels and has a wealth of wisdom about writing and I try to supply the laughs...

Blue skies,
Les

JUST LIKE THAT and THE PERFECT CRIME now in paperback!

2011-12-11T16:52:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

My latest two novels, JUST LIKE THAT and THE PERFECT CRIME from StoneGate Ink are now available in paperback. One quick source is to just go to my page on Amazon to order at http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&field-keywords=les+edgerton&x=0&y=0

THE PERFECT CRIME is $13.97
JUST LIKE THAT is $12.97

I'm excited! Especially since they're available for Christmas presents just in time.

Blue skies,
Les

Coming soon...

2011-12-09T18:16:00.000-08:00

The Bitch by Les Edgerton

The Bitch explores the dark choices that Jake, as a two-time offender faces to save both his life and his soul--life imprisonment if caught for the third time under the federal ha-bitch-ual criminal law--known to outlaws as "The Bitch." Choices that may cost him everything and everyone he loves. What are the limits of loyalty? What is the spiritual process by which a savvy hair designer deteriorates into a mass murderer? A work in the cold existentialist tradition of Sartre and Camus, and the transgressive fiction of Celine, The Bitch struggles for answers and, on finding them, a way out.
The author, Les Edgerton, is an ex-con who spent two years in prison for burglary at the Pendleton Reformatory in Indiana. Since his release, he has earned a B.A. from Indiana University and an MFA in Writing from Vermont College. This will be the thirteenth book he has published, with several more forthcoming later this year and next, including a short story collection, an existential noir novel, a new black comedy novel, and his memoir. His career for many years as an outlaw and criminal lend an air of rare verisimilitude to his crime novels.
The book cover was designed by Butterflies & Hurricanes in Prague. The novel was edited by Eddie Vega for Bare Knuckles Press.

ALERT! My publisher, Bare Knuckles Press, will be on the G-Spot Radio Show today at 4 pm EST

2011-12-06T12:48:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

Sorry for the lateness of this alert, but just learned that Eddie Vega, my publisher of THE BITCH and THE RAPIST will be on the Gio Gelati radio show in a few minutes. You can hear it live at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/gelatisscoop

If you miss it, it will be on the site and you can click on it at any time.

Blue skies,
Les

How we came to write our stories for OFF THE RECORD

2011-11-28T09:51:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

Over at Patti Abbott's blog, you'll find a series of posts from the writers who contributed stories to Luca Veste's anthology, OFF THE RECORD. Today, I'm one of the writers up, along with Benoit Lelievre. Check it out at: http://pattinase.blogspot.com/2011/11/how-i-came-to-write-this-story-benoit.html

Enjoy!

Blue skies,
Les

OFF THE RECORD available now!

2011-11-27T08:30:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

This is an exciting day! A book which I am sure will become an instant classic has just been released. Notable noir writer Luca Veste came up with the idea a few months ago to invite a bunch of noir writers from both Europe and the U.S. to submit short stories for a collection he was assembling where he asked the writers to write a story based on a classic tune. The result is OFF THE RECORD and it’s available as of today through Amazon. A print version will also become available soon. The proceeds will benefit two charities on both sides of the Atlantic. Check it out at these links:

http://www.amazon.com/Off-Record-Charity-Anthology-ebook/dp/B006EU1E7S/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1322398350&sr=8-1

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Off-Record-Charity-Anthology-ebook/dp/B006EU1E7S/ref=sr_1_22?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1322395618&sr=1-22

It will benefit these two charities:

In the UK, National Literacy Trust. (http://www.literacytrust.org.uk/)

In the US, Children's Literacy Initiative. (http://www.cliontheweb.org/)

I took one of my all-time favorite singers, Tom Waits, and selected my favorite of his songs, “Small Change” to create my story. I imagined sitting in one of my old haunts in New Orleans, The Dungeon, and imagined Waits walking in one day as I sat soused at the bar, looking for material for his music. Now, the “real” story of his classic song can be revealed…

Check out the selections on the juke box below.

1.Neil White - Stairway To Heaven
2.Col Bury – Respect
3.Steve Mosby – God Moving Over The Face Of Waters
4.Les Edgerton - Small Change
5.Heath Lowrance - I Wanna Be Your Dog
6.AJ Hayes - Light My Fire
7.Sean Patrick Reardon - Redemption Song
8.Ian Ayris - Down In The Tube Station At Midnight
9.Nick Triplow - A New England
10.Charlie Wade - Sheila Take A Bow
11.Iain Rowan - Purple Haze
12.Thomas Pluck - Free Bird
13.Matthew C. Funk - Venus In Furs
14.R Thomas Brown - Dock Of The Bay
15.Chris Rhatigan – Shadowboxer
16.Patti Abbott - Roll Me Away
17.Chad Rhorbacher - I Wanna Be Sedated
18.Court Merrigan - Back In Black
19.Paul D. Brazill - Life On Mars?
20.Nick Boldock – Superstition
21.Vic Watson - Bye Bye Baby
22.Benoit Lelievre - Blood On The Dancefloor
23.Ron Earl Phillips - American Pie
24.Chris La Tray – Detroit Rock City
25.Nigel Bird - Super Trouper
26.Pete Sortwell – So Low, So High
27.Julie Morrigan - Behind Blue Eyes
28.David Barber – Paranoid
29.McDroll - Nights In White Satin
30.Cath Bore - Be My Baby
31.Eric Beetner - California Dreamin'
32.Steve Weddle - A Day In The Life
33.Darren Sant - Karma Police
34.Simon Logan - Smells Like Teen Spirit
35.Luca Veste - Comfortably Numb
36.Nick Quantrill - Death Or Glory
37.Helen FitzGerald - Two Little Boys
38.Ray Banks - God Only Knows

With forewords from UK writer Matt Hilton, and US writer Anthony Neil Smith.

This is a rare opportunity to see what some of our deranged minds are creating these days.

Blue skies,

Les

P.S. One of the authors, Court Merrigan, has provided a soundtrack on YouTube with all the songs we chose. How cool is that! Here's the link:
http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL38F4E2939555C333

Review of Julia Madeleine's novel NO ONE TO HEAR YOU SCREAM

2011-11-23T11:38:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

The term “novel” means exactly that; something original, something new. And, each novel should be exactly that.

Precisely what Julia Madeleine’s novel, NO ONE TO HEAR YOU SCREAM is. An original work.

For starters, it takes us inside the mind of a brutal criminal. Madeleine isn’t the first novelist to do so, but unlike many who attempt to convey criminals to their readers, hers rings true. As a former criminal myself, I’m perhaps more sensitive to how writers portray outlaws, and to be honest, most get it wrong. Trust me--Julia doesn’t.

This is a brilliant character study on several levels. Involved is a teenager with mental issues, a father and stepmother with mental and emotional issues, a criminal with mental issues—in short, a typical dysfunctional family. Seriously, the insights delivered into these characters are brilliant and come on nearly every page.

NO ONE TO HEAR YOU SCREAM reminded me in a way of Charles Bukowski’s best story (imo), “The Fiend” in that it delivers a man who is presumably totally evil to most who might know him, but shows the spark of humanity that resides in all of us, even the worst among us.

If you like your fiction dark and original and to keep you up late at night turning the pages, this is the novel for you.

http://www.amazon.com/No-One-Hear-You-Scream/dp/0980887429/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1322077042&sr=1-1

Blue skies,

Les

Check out Thomas Pluck's blog today!

2011-11-23T10:45:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

I am totally stoked, jazzed, pleased, honored, humbled... all of that... by what respected noir writer and commentator Thomas Pluck posted on his blog today. Thank you, sir!

Check it out at http://www.pluckyoutoo.com/2011/11/smooth-criminals.html#disqus_thread

I'm smiling so much I split my lip!

Blue skies,
Les

Goodis acolytes read works at grave | Noir Nation: International Crime Fiction

2011-11-22T08:16:00.000-08:00

Goodis acolytes read works at grave | Noir Nation: International Crime Fiction

Click on the link for a wonderful video of homage being paid to the late David Goodis. Inspiring!

Blue skies,
Les

Paul D Brazill's You Would Say That, Wouldn't You?: Out Now: 13 Shots Of Noir by Paul D Brazill

2011-11-21T15:14:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,
Check out Paul D. Brazill's new collection, 13 SHOTS OF NOIR, by the master himself. I've read it and it's one of the best reads I've had in a long, long time. I'll be posting a review in a week or so--I'm kind of jammed up right now with books to review but promise I'll have it up within the next two weeks. In the meantime, do yourself a huge favor and check it out!

Paul D Brazill's You Would Say That, Wouldn't You?: Out Now: 13 Shots Of Noir by Paul D Brazill: English writer Paul D Brazill's 13 Shots Of Noi r is a collection of short stories in the vein of Roald Dahl, The Twilight Zone and Alf...

Two-fer reviews--THE DONOR and AMERICAN COUSINS

2011-11-19T10:59:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

I’m going to write a “two-fer” review today. I’m taking a look at Scottish novelist, Helen FitzGerald’s novel, The Donor, along with her screenwriter husband Sergio Casci’s film, AMERICAN COUSINS.

THE DONOR

What if you were the only parent of two children and it was within your power to save one of their lives, but not both? How is such a decision even possible? How would you live with yourself whichever child you decided should live? How would the child you decided to sacrifice view you before she died? How would the child you saved regard you?

How would you look at yourself, no matter what choice you made?

I’ve just finished reading Helen FitzGerald’s novel, The Donor, which poses this very same problem for Will Marion whose wife Cynthia left him years ago for her criminal boyfriend, leaving their twin daughters, Georgie and Kay for Will to raise.

Twin daughters who both develop kidney disease and need transplants to survive.

I can’t remark on the plot much because it has multiple twists and turns that the reader should discover for him- or herself. Suffice to say that this is a complicated, multi-layered story that surprises at every turn, the tension building until it’s excruciating. Any parent that reads it will be forced to consider their own children and wonder how they’d react—what they’d do in the same circumstance.

It’s a brilliant character study of the three main players—the father and his two daughters--as each work through the psychological minefield individually. FitzGerald has delivered a powerful drama, gorgeously writ with grace, black humor, and compassion, and is the kind of literature one seizes upon when encountering its like and proclaims to all who will listen: Read this book!

I’m drained.

Emotionally spent.

How did it affect me?

The instant I read the last page, I drove down to my local license bureau and changed my driver’s license so that it showed I’m an organ donor. That’s how powerful it was. As perhaps an interesting aside, in a conversation with Ms. FitzGerald, when I told her what I’d done she revealed that she’d done the same thing in the midst of writing the book. I think many readers will do the same thing. I don’t know of many novels that trigger this kind of action.

http://www.amazon.com/The-Donor-ebook/dp/B005685ELQ/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1321728891&sr=1-1

…and then, I watched Helen’s screenwriter husband Sergio Casci’s film, AMERICAN COUSINS.

Twice.

The first time by myself and then my wife came home from work and I watched it again with her.

Simply put, this is what movies, as an art form, are all about. It had every single element a movie should have—intelligent and genuinely funny humor, crime drama, a riveting and thoroughly sweet romance, justice meted out, incredible obstacles, a fantastic character arc, incredible music and wonderful scenery. It made me want to immigrate to Scotland. This is a movie that resonated with me and keeps on resonating. It has a depth to it rarely seen in most films these days.

I’m not a fan of romantic comedies, but this one was different. In fact, when I was raving about it to my wife, she asked me if I was sure this was a romantic comedy. Are you sure it doesn’t have any helicopters in it or car chases, she asked, suspiciously. When I told her there wasn’t a single helicopter in it, she put her hand on my forehead to see if I was feverish…

I tried to explain to her that while, yes, it was a romantic comedy, it also had “guy” stuff in it. Although no ‘copter crashes there was an explosion… some shooting…

The movie is based on Casci’s own family story, when two cousins immigrate from Tuscany, one to America and the other to Scotland, each vowing to the other that whoever made his fortune first would then send for the other to join him.

Many years later, although each family has become firmly entrenched in his respective adopted country, they’ve remained in touch. When two of the American family, Gino and Settimo, now Mafiosi, find themselves on the run as a result of a criminal deal gone wrong with Ukrainian bad guys, they decide to take advantage of their family ties by flying to Scotland and laying low in their Scottish cousin Roberto’s home. They’ve assumed he’s cut from the same cloth as the American branch—a tough gangster—but they quickly find out he’s a gentle and peaceful man who, along with his grandfather, owns a fish and chips restaurant in Glasgow. From this fish out of water beginning, emerges a story that’s really got everything—the aforementioned elements—all delivered with elegant understatement. Nothing is over the top as is so often in films like this. The violence has a realistic edge, the romance is bittersweet and not syrupy, and just about everyone in the movie is believable. Many times these days, I’ll see the promo and then go to the movie and that’s the best part of the movie. With this film, they could have picked any part of the movie for a promo as the “best part” and would have been spot on. No weaknesses—it delivers throughout.

This is what more movies should be.

http://www.amazon.com/American-Cousins-Danny-Nucci/dp/B000KF0NFM/ref=sr_1_1?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1321729031&sr=1-1

Since I’ve read Helen’s novel and seen Sergio’s movie, we’ve become long-distance friends and one time I asked them how they worked. Turns out, they work in the same room and often one turns to the other when he or she encounters a problem and consults with the other. That must be why I feel the same “heart” in each of their works. An amazing couple!

Presently, Sergio is working on developing the screenplay from Helen’s novel, The Donor. I can’t wait until it comes out!

Another “inside” bit of info I learned. Both artists are in the movie AMERICAN COUSINS. They are the windsurfing couple getting ready to launch their—whaddya call it? windsurfer boat?—in the scene at Loch Lomand. Before I’d seen the movie, I’d researched Sergio on the Internet and saw a handsome dude in the photos with his interviews. Just looked like your average successful movie dude—coifed and dressed ala Hollywood “success” style. Then, I saw the scene where he and Helen appeared… and nearly choked. He didn’t look like the photos I’d seen at all. In the movie scene, he was a bit… how should I say this?... a bit portly. When I mentioned my surprise, he laughed and said as soon as he saw the film, he began a diet immediately…

I’m a huge, huge fan of both Helen FitzGerald and Sergio Casci. Check out their work. You’ll be glad you did.

Blue skies,

Les

RADIO INTERVIEWS ALL OVER THE PLACE!

2011-11-15T07:28:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

Couple of things going on today you might want to check out.

First, I’d recommended my friend Lisa Lieberman Doctor to Jennifer Wilkov to be interviewed on her radio blog show on WomensRadio and it’s up! To listen to a truly brilliant writer and Hollywood executive who operated at the highest levels of filmland and television delivering useful information for both screenwriters and novelists, listen to her interview at http://www.womensradio.com/episodes/Your-Book-Is-Your-Hook!--Military-Wife-and-Author-Plus-A-Creative-Writing-Coach/10632.html

Second, I’ll be participating in my second interview today at 6 pm EST on Giovanni Gelati’s radio blog show The GZone. This should be like a fart in a skillet, as I suggested to Gio that instead of just interviewing me, he might consider some other folks as well, in a panel setting. So, it’ll be moi, plus Cort McMeel and Eddie Vega, founders of Bare Knuckle Press and Noir Nation Magazine, along with Sandra Ruttan and Brian Lindenmuth of Spinetingler Magazine and Snubnose Press. I’ve got stuff coming out from all of these guys, so it should be kind of interesting. Listen to us at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/gelatisscoop. The interview goes live at 6, but if you miss it, it’ll be in the archives and readily available. I’m kind of excited about this and hope lots of you tune in.

Blue skies,

Les

Review of ALL THE YOUNG WARRIORS by Anthony Neil Smith

2011-11-10T10:13:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

Here's a review I just completed on Anthony Neil Smith's newest novel, ALL THE YOUNG WARRIORS.

http://www.amazon.com/All-The-Young-Warriors-ebook/dp/B005ZMHX2G/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1320948332&sr=1-1

What a brilliant novel! Alternating between the harsh landscapes of two cultures—frigid Minnesota and the searing heat of Somalia—this novel reports on both worlds without politicizing and without moralizing, allowing the reader to arrive at their own conclusions.

What was fascinating for me was that it read as an intense psychological study of very disparate personalities that, at the end, created an understanding and empathy for every single character. With what is really an economy of words, Smith shows a true complexity for each character’s actions. This is a doctoral thesis in understanding how motivations drive people. What’s even more remarkable is that we see four very different people with four entirely different goals and each one is carefully and expertly drawn. There are no “good” guys nor any “bad” guys per se. There are just people who do good things and people who do bad things, with each of the four performing both kinds of actions, but each, no matter what they may do is clearly drawn with not only a deftness rarely seen in but the best of fiction, but each a person driven by forces completely understandable.

Very good literature allows us to see into the hidden soul of one character. Literature that deserves the epithet of being great, allows us to see into the deepest recesses of more than one. All the Young Warriors gives us an unprecedented view of all four of the major characters. I’m sure there have been novels which have done this before, but I confess I can’t recall which ones those were, and that tells me perhaps that I haven’t yet read them. Perhaps I just imagine they’re out there…

But, I’m not imagining this one.

As a writer, I open books for two reasons. One, to be entertained and secondly—which is at least equal in importance to me—to learn how to be a better writer by what and how the author has crafted the work. This novel succeeded on both levels.

I simply cannot get over the characters Smith has created. What’s revealing about his craft is how he delivers each character—not through introspection or peeking into their minds, but mostly by their actions. That’s hard to do!

First, you have what at first glance appears to be the standard issue cop/detective in thrillers, Ray Bleeker. Quickly, however, he becomes much more than a version of the stereotypical veteran cop solving a crime or mystery. His motivation is powerful. He does what he feels he has to do because of the love of a woman and a sense of honor he feels due her memory. He knowingly sacrifices his future and his life for what he holds to be a just cause. His quest becomes noble and this alone transforms him and makes him different than many similar fictional characters. This is no “Jack Reacher” embued with a superman physique and supernatural physical skills, kicking ass ala a cartoon superhero. This is no “Sherlock Holmes” with a superior intellect. No “Virgil Flowers” with an entire and impressive state crime-fighting bureaucracy behind him. This is a solid detective who can handle himself physically but isn’t a superhero, able to vanquish a dozen ninja warriors, but just a better-than-average fighter who’s getting a bit long in the tooth. His detecting skills are not inborn in him by virtue of some detective “gene,” but have been acquired by years on the job and from intelligent observation gleaned from many cases. He’s kind of an Everyman and what distinguishes him is the level of love he holds for a woman and his child. He embodies what used to be known as “Yankee ingenuity.” He doesn’t own a bunch of power tools; he owns an inventive, practical mind. What distinguishes him from other popular detectives in fiction is that he has a character arc. He is a man who will be an entirely different person at the end of the story, unlike most series characters who remain largely unchanged by the struggle they go through.

The second major character, Mustafa Abdi Bahdoon, was utterly fascinating. Easily the most complex character in the cast. At one time a powerful gang leader, feared by friend and foe alike, he has long since walked away from his past and is living the “straight” life, working at a Target store. This, despite the knowledge that he might be murdered at any time by his former gang members. He’s of Somalia extract, but all he wants to do is be American, despite his violent background. He also is driven by love. The love of his son.

His son, Adem, is as complex as the others, and shows perhaps the biggest character arc of all. He begins as a college student who is somewhat popular, but possessed of a follower’s personality. He’s the dutiful child, who gets swept up unexpectedly in politics and a murder and ends up in Somalia as he flees a murder charge and prison time, and at first is idealistic about the cause he has joined, but soon discovers he has neither the firmness of belief in that cause that is necessary but that he’s pretty much a coward. He mostly remains a coward until near the end and through a series of events, he becomes a sort of Goebbels. Why Goebbels, you ask? Well, because that’s kind of what I was reminded of in this story—it could have been structured from a study in how two powerful Nazis became who they were. Adem is Goebbels and the last character…

Jibriil… is the “Hitler” character. Indeed, I kept thinking of Hitler as Jibriil moved through the pages. Not the finished-product-Hitler, whom most see in their minds’ eye, ruling over the Third Reich as the hob-booted despot he became, but the Hitler who was a failure as a painter and mostly a nobody until he found himself in the right place at the right time and took advantage of the situation. Jibriil is the young Hitler, at his late childhood and early rise to power. What is fascinating is that through Smith’s depiction of his character, it becomes clear how an insignificant nobody can emerge as a cruel tyrant like Mein Fuhrer when the planets align and the circumstances allow.

I may be the only one who looks at this novel this way, but I can’t help seeing these kinds of parallels. Whether Smith intended it or not, he’s created a case study in how otherwise ordinary folks, under the right circumstances, can become the Hitlers of the world and how the same thing can happen today. And perhaps is.

What is one of the most amazing things about this book is that every single one of the major characters undergoes a significant character arc. How in the hell does Smith do that?! That’s remarkable. In practical terms, that means this novel is perfect to be made into a movie. You’ve got not one, but four characters A-list actors would kill to play.

This is a brilliant book, possibly the best novel of the year. It's for sure in the top three or four. I've read more great books this year than I ever have--great time for top novels!

Blue skies,

Les

HOOKED... for free?!

2011-11-07T09:09:00.000-08:00

Hi folks,

Well, I woke up today thinking it would just be another ho-hum day in Mudville... when I clicked on an email from an editor I really respect and discovered that Writer's Digest was offering my book HOOKED for free! (It wasn't a WD editor who notified me.)

Now, I know how Anthony Neil Smith (Doc Noir) felt in his blogpost: http://anthonyneilsmith.typepad.com/hermansgreasyspoon/2011/11/theyre-giving-away-my-book-for-free-the-bastards.html

My sentiments, exactly... Although, I have a sneaking suspicion Mr. Smith's publisher let him know what they were going to do before they did it. And, they only did it for a day... And, I'll bet he gave his okay.

What bothered me is that WD didn't see fit to let me know that they were doing this. Did I say "bothered me?" I guess that's the most accurate terminology to describe my initial reaction where I kicked my cat, threw a book through the window, cursed at the top of my lungs, and some other similar actions...

The thing is, I don't believe in ever giving away my work for free. Perhaps WD knows that and is why they didn't inform me.

I know there are writers out there who profess their desire is only to "get people to read them." Well, that ain't my desire at all, unless they pay for the hours and days and weeks and months and years it took to get that book written. I rarely see plumbers giving away free work to "get people to notice them." Figure my work is just as valuable...

I understand the impetus behind this "freebie" thing. That it create a fan base who will then buy other work. I guess. I'm just not a believer in this strategy.

Maybe it will turn out just fine. Just went to the Amazon site and saw Hooked's rank:

Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #8 Free in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Free in Kindle Store)
- #1 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Nonfiction > Reference > Writing > Fiction
- Now, I'm not as mad as I was... I don't know what to think. Maybe they know what they're doing. The other thing that bothered me was that it was done as a promo for NaNoWrit or whatever they call it. That's an event I'm solidly... against. In fact, I tell my students I recommend they avoid participating, as in my opinion it only leads to bad writing habits. But, that's me. I do have many friends who participate in it and if they enjoy the experience, I'm glad for them. I just think it doesn't lead to many positive things for a serious writer. And, since I think it's more of a negative thing for a writer who wants to create good writing habits, I kind of resent my book is being given away free to promote it.
  
  I realize my thoughts here may alienate some folks. That's okay. If a writer doesn't have an opinion and is unwilling to express it, what kind of writer is that? One who would do well working for Pravda, I guess... Not this boy-o.
  
  I have nothing whatsoever against anyone who takes advantage of Writer's Digest largess... I'd do the same thing. In fact, I emailed some friends to alert them that they could get it for free and even Twittered about it. If you can't fight 'em, join 'em... At least if folks can get a free copy, I'd rather it be people I know and like.
  
  I think what bothered me the most was that WD couldn't even be bothered to let me know what they were going to do. The author isn't important in these things, I guess. It occurs to me that this may be one of the contributing factors to the demise of print publishers... how they view their authors and how they value their input and opinion, especially of their own work.
  
  Now, I'm going to lie down and try to practice my own philosophy of "not letting others rent space in my head."
  
  I just wish I had the power to give away all of Writer's Digest books for the next year... And not let them know until it was a done deal... Tell 'em if they didn't like it, too bad--it's in the contract...
  
  Sign me:
  One-pissed-off-writer
  Les
  
  P.S. What gripes me is that Hooked was still on a number of Amazon's best-selling lists, mostly in the UK and other European lists...

REVIEW OF ED LYNSKEY'S NOVEL LAKE CHARLES: A MYSTERY NOVEL

2011-11-03T09:04:00.000-07:00

Hi folks,

When I first picked up Ed Lynskey’s novel, Lake Charles, I was excited to read a book set in a place I used to live and had fond memories of—Lake Charles, Louisiana. As I began reading, I got a bit confused as the setting didn’t sound anything like the place I’d lived in.

Turns out, it wasn’t. The Lake Charles of Lynskey’s novel was another lake entirely, a man-made body of water created by the TVA in Tennessee.

Also turns out, it didn’t matter. This was as dark and as Gothic as anything else Southern, and it could have worked just as well if it had been set in the Louisiana town of the same name.

And, it is dark and very Gothic! Atmosphere up the yazoo. Or… kudzu… Precisely my cup of tea. An absolutely amazing novel.

Rather than go into the plot points, which others, better qualified for that kind of stuff do a better job than I ever could, I just want to talk about my visceral reactions. First, I never consciously seek out symbolism in novels. Symbols mostly just get in the way of enjoying the story. But, there are some in here that were so well-done and so organic to the tale that not only did they not interfere with the reading pleasure, but caused it to transcend what will be termed “genre” literature by some into something I feel would more accurately be looked at as simply literature. Good and even great literature.

The lake itself is the most pervading character in the novel. Its water is slimy, odoriferous, and malignant. I’m assuming Lynskey intended it to stand for things manmade, things our modern civilization have wrought to what used to be a wondrous example of nature with a capital N. It reminded me of what uber-agent Donald Maass once related to me as being one of the elements that all great books contained—a magical place. A physical place in the best novels where seminal events took place. We were talking about that at a workshop we were both appearing at a couple of years ago, and it dawned on me that he was exactly right. “Like the street in Dennis Lehane’s Mystic River,” I exclaimed. “The story begins there with the boy’s kidnapping and it comes up at crucial times and ends there—in the movie with the Sean Penn character, where he slumps to the curb when he realizes the monstrosity of his murder of that same boy now grown, years later.”

“Exactly,” Don said, and we were off to a discussion of similar mystical/mythical places in literature.

Well, add Lake Charles to that list. Like Dennis Lehane with his Boston Southy street, like Raymond Chandler with L.A., like Ellen Gilchrist with New Orleans, like Russell Banks with various locales—Lynskey has made a setting a living, breathing character.

A dark,foreboding, malignant, malevolent character. Since reading this book, I’ve seen the lake in my nightmares at night and I always awake drenched with sweat. Only the best of books have that power and this one qualifies. It’s a story of loyalties—both familial and friendship, a tale of the evilness of drugs and what they’ve done to society, and, in the end, and for me, most of all it’s a look back at the days of my youth growing up in East Texas where people took care of their problems themselves and if it took violence to enact justice, well, violence is what took place. We didn’t look for the police or the courts or lawyers to solve our problems, but acted as men and took care of them ourselves with whatever it took. In these days of “social consciousness” or whatever they call it, taking matters into one’s own hands is frowned on and will likely get you called out on talk shows, but… man-oh-man! I long for those days!

This is a vigilante novel and an example of how vigilantes aren’t always the bad and nasty thing they’re often made out to be. It seems to me that this and novels and movies of this sort are hugely popular simply because there are a lot of us who long for those “good old days” when people took care of their own problems and didn’t depend on others. Brendan Fishback, the protagonist, hooks up with his best friend’s father, Mr. Kuzawa, as they team up to avenge the murder of Kuzawa’s son and Brendan’s best friend, Cobb, and to find the kidnappers of Brendan’s twin sister Edna by the same folks, and the result is Southern justice of the sort that makes you jump up and cry: “Yeah!” when they triumph over evil.

This is just one of the best novels I’ve read this year, simply put.

Blue skies,

Les

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_i_0_12?url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&field-keywords=lake+charles+by+ed+lynskey&sprefix=lake+charles

THE SATURDAY BOY: HAPPY BLASTED HEATH DAY!

2011-11-01T09:08:00.000-07:00

THE SATURDAY BOY: HAPPY BLASTED HEATH DAY!: And here it is, Merry Blasted Tuesday, folks! Now you can officially purchase any number of the fine novels those dastardly f**ks have...

I'm reading both of their first novels now and they're fantastic! This is an absolutely terrific deal for books from a couple of the best writers working today--Anthony Neil Smith and Ray Banks. I highly recommend both.

Also, check out Doc Noir's blogpost at http://anthonyneilsmith.typepad.com/hermansgreasyspoon/2011/11/a-one-time-blasted-off-super-deal-today-only.html

Blue skies,
Les

MAGNA CUM MURDER is the place to be in October!

2011-10-30T15:07:00.000-07:00

Hi folks,

I returned late last night from attending and participating in the Magna Cum Murder festival in Muncie, Indiana at Ball State University, and had an absolutely lovely time!

While there were a lot of authors there who I’ve seen at events such as Bouchercon, there was a decidedly different atmosphere. Less frenetic and a bit quieter, but very satisfying. While Bouchercon is made up more of thriller writers such as Lee Childs, Joe Finder, Anthony Neil Smith, Joe R. Lansdale and the like, Magna is home to a bigger contingent of mystery and suspense writers, although there were several thriller writers in attendance as well. Although, it turns out that many of those I’ve just named have been at this festival in the past. I think perhaps the reason it’s a bit less frenetic is that there aren’t any agents (or any that I was aware of, anyway), and most of the folks in attendance were there mostly as fans of mysteries and suspense, including the writers themselves. A place to enjoy the genres without business being conducted. And these folks were the best-informed audience I've ever seen.

My main initial motivation for attending was to meet author John Gilstrap in person. I’ve been an admirer of his thrillers for a long time and we even connected on the phone awhile back when we were introduced to each other by blog radio hostess Jennifer Wilkov after we’d both appeared on her Women’s Radio Show. One of the organizers of the MCM festival, Austin Lugar, graciously put me on a panel with John and we had a great time!

While meeting John was a decided highlight, I met and became friends with a number of other fantastic writers. Folks like Con Lehane (my new best friend…), Ruth Dudley Edwards, Jim Doherty, Mike Lawson (my smoking friend…), Deni Dietz (my other smoking friend), W.S. (Wendy) Gager, David Walker, T. Lee Harris, Marian Allen, Gwen Mayo, Maris Soule, and Cathy (Cat) Akers-Jordan (not a writer, but a teacher and knowledgeable fan, with whom I had a great conversation with her and her mom, Ginger Jordan. Got to meet Parnell Hall, an amazing writer who has had enough experiences to fill at least six memoirs.

I was on two panels. On the first, I was totally out of my element! It was a game-show panel where we debated along with the audience to figure out who the world’s best detective was. The only problem I had was I was only familiar with one of the names—Harry Bosch. I’d read novels featuring the others, but far, far back in the mists of time and didn’t recall enough about them to be able to argue their merits. In spite of that, it was fun, mostly because this is a nonjudgmental audience and nobody called me out on my ignorance. In a series of emails back and forth before the conference, between us participants and the moderator, Austin Lugar, in trying to determine the detectives we’d be debating over, I was thoroughly intimidated by one of the panelists, Ruth Dudley Edwards, and in fact, emailed Austin, telling him I was scared to death of her and asking that he sit me away from her—she terrified me! Well, as it turned out, he seated her next to me… and I’m glad he did. Turned out she’s not a bit scary, but a thoroughly delightful person. Besides having a REALLY BIG BRAIN, she's the sweetest person on earth. The others on the panel were Parnell Hall, W.S. (Wendy) Gager and Con Lehane.

What was great about this panel was that Harry Bosch won! If you’re only going to know one of the contestants, it pays to know the winner…

The second panel was the one I had really been looking forward to. It was moderated by my hero, John Gilstrap, and included my new best friend, Con Lehane, my smoking buddy, Mike Lawson, the aforementioned Ruth Dudley Edwards, and the festival guest speaker, Bob Brier (aka Mr. Mummy) who is the best-known Egyptologist and mummy expert working today. Our panel’s mandate was to discuss how our jobs have affected our writing. My “job” that I discussed mostly was my days as a criminal… When I told what my job was, half the audience on my side moved over to the other side…

I’m kidding! It was a great panel and we had a wonderful time and the audience was super.

I met so many interesting writers and I know I’ll leave somebody out. One guy who was really cool was Jim Doherty, a real-life cop who currently is the police technical expert on the Dick Tracy cartoon strip.

Deni Dietz was really cool. She’s a senior editor for Five Star Mysteries and told me to send her a query. Working on that now… She has had a fascinating life, including being a jazz singer in the French Quarter. I’m trying to remember if I’d ever seen her perform as it turns out we both lived there at the same time.

All the meals were provided for by the festival and were the best I’ve ever had at such a gathering. Simply delicious!

Alas, I had to leave early before the Saturday night banquet. I sprained my back a few months ago and it’s never recovered fully and it began acting up and put me in enough pain I had to leave for home early.

All-in-all, this was one of the coolest writer’s festivals I’ve ever had the pleasure of attending and honor of participating in. The folks who run it are true pros and every one a book lover and knowledgeable about the mystery and suspense genres. If you ever get a chance to go to the annual Magna Cum Murder, I recommend it heartily!

Blue skies,

Les

Bookmark their website for next year’s festival at http://www.magnacummurder.com/

JOKES REDUX

2011-10-27T04:40:00.000-07:00

Hi folks,

Some of this I’ve posted before and some is new. Just thought you could use a good laugh or two. Please be advised to keep this from your young kids and relatives who have a burr under their saddle over cursing and X-rated humor…

New Rule: Stop giving me that pop-up ad for Classmates.com! There's a reason I don't talk to people for 25 years. Because I don't particularly like them! Besides, I already know what the captain of the football team is doing these days: mowing my lawn and applying fertilizer.

New Rule: Don't eat anything that's served to you out a window unless you're a seagull. People are acting all shocked that a human finger was found in a bowl of Wendy's chili. Hey, it cost less than a dollar. What did you expect it to contain? Trout? Luckily, it was only a finger! If it was a whole hand, Congress would have voted to keep it alive.

New Rule: Stop saying that teenage boys who have sex with their hot, blonde teachers are permanently damaged. I have a better description for these kids: lucky son of a guns.

New Rule: Ladies, leave your eyebrows alone. Here's how much men care about your eyebrows: do you have two of them? Okay, we're done.

New Rule: There's no such thing as flavored water. There's a whole aisle of this shit at the supermarket - water, but without that watery taste. Sorry, but flavored water is called a soft drink. You want flavored water? Pour some scotch over ice and let it melt. That's your flavored water.

New Rule: Stop messing with old people. Target is introducing a redesigned pill bottle that's square, with a bigger label. And the top is now the bottom. And by the time Grandpa figures out how to open it, his butt will be in the morgue. Congratulations, Target, you just solved the Social Security crisis.

New Rule: The more complicated the Starbucks order, the bigger the idiot. If you walk into a Starbucks and order a "decaf grande half-soy, half-low fat, iced vanilla, double-shot, gingerbread cappuccino, extra dry, light ice, with one Sweet-n-Low and one NutraSweet," ooh, you're a huge idiot.

New Rule: I'm not the cashier! By the time I look up from sliding my card, entering my PIN number, pressing "Enter," verifying the amount, deciding, no, I don't want cash back, and pressing "Enter" again, the kid who is supposed to be ringing me up is standing there eating my Almond Joy. Paper, plastic? I don't have time for that. I've just been called to do a cleanup on Aisle Nine!

New Rule: Just because your tattoo has Chinese characters in it doesn't make you spiritual. It's right above the crack of your ass. And it translates to "beef with broccoli." The last time you did anything spiritual, you were praying to God you weren't pregnant. You're not spiritual. You're just high.

New Rule: If your mom is still driving you to school, you’re not a “gangsta.” Pull your pants up so we don’t have to see your crack. It isn’t nearly as attractive as you might think.

New Rule: Competitive eating isn't a sport. It's one of the seven deadly sins. ESPN recently televised the US Open of Competitive Eating, because watching those athletes at the poker table was just too damned exciting. What's next, competitive farting? Oh, wait. They're already doing that. It's called "The Howard Stern Show."

New Rule: I don't need a bigger mega M&M. If I'm extra hungry for M&Ms, I'll go nuts and eat two.

New Rule: If you're going to insist on making movies based on crappy old television shows, then you have to give everyone in the Cineplex a remote so we can see what's playing on the other screens. Let's remember that the reason something was a television show in the first place is the idea wasn't good enough to be a movie.

New Rule: No more gift registries. You know, it used to be just for weddings. Now it's for babies and new homes and graduations from rehab. Picking up the stuff you want and having other people buy it for you isn't gift giving, it's the white people version of looting.

New Rule: and this one is long overdue: No more bathroom attendants. After I zip up, some guy is offering me a towel and a mint like I just made it with George Michael. I can't even tell if he's supposed to be there, or just some freak with a fetish. I don't want to be on your web cam, dude. I just want to wash my hands.

New Rule: When I ask how old your toddler is, I don't need to know in months. "27 Months." "He's two," will do just fine. He's not a cheese. And I didn't care in the first place.

JOKE

My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year when we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, and my friends encouraged me. My girlfriend? She was a dream! There was only one thing bothering me.

That one thing was her younger sister.

My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight miniskirts, and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when near me, and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else. One day little sister calls and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she could not overcome and did not really want to overcome.

She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister.

I was in total shock and could not say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me.

"I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top, she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me.

I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house and walked straight toward my car. My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We could not ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family!"

The moral of this story is:

Always keep your condoms in your car.

For Those Who Take Life Too Seriously

1.) Save the whales. Collect the whole set.

2.) A day without sunshine is like, night.

3.) On the other hand, you have different fingers.

4.) I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.

5.) 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.

6.) 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

7.) I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

8.) You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.

9.) I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be
without sponges.

10.) Honk if you love peace and quiet.

11.) Remember half the people you know are below
average.

12.) Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how popular it remains?

13.) Nothing is foolproof to a talented fool.

14.) Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

15.) He who laughs last thinks slowest.

16.) Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

17.) Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

18.) The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

19.) I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.

20.) I intend to live forever - so far so good.

21.) Borrow money from a pessimist - they don't expect it back.

22.) If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

23.) My mind is like a steel trap - rusty and illegal in 37 states.

24.) Quantum mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of.

25.) The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.

26.) Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.

27.) When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane and going the wrong way.

28.) If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

29.) A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.

30.) Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

31.) For every action there is an equal and opposite criticism.

32.) Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.

33.) Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with.

34.) No one is listening until you make a mistake.

35.) Success always occurs in private and failure in full view.

36.) The colder the x-ray tables the more of your body is required on it.

37.) The hardness of butter is directly proportional to the softness of the bread.

38.) The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the ability to reach it.

39.) To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

40.) To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your principles.

41.) How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my hand...

42.) You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

43.) Two wrongs are only the beginning.

44.) The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.

45.) The sooner you fall behind the more time you'll have to catch up.

46.) A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

47.) Change is inevitable except from vending machines.

48.) If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.

49.) Always try to be modest and be proud of it!

50.) Get a new car for your wife... It'll be a great trade!

Thanks to a retired Air Force officer for sending this "paraphrase" of a memorable public safety announcement from Alaska Air flight attendants...

"I was flying to San Francisco from Seattle this weekend, and the flight attendant reading the flight safety information had the whole plane looking at each other like 'what the heck?' (Getting Seattle people to look at each other is an accomplishment.) So once we got airborne, I took out my laptop and typed up what she said so I wouldn't forget. I've left out a few parts I'm sure, but this is most of it."

Before takeoff... Hello and welcome to Alaska Flight 438 to San Francisco. If you're going to San Francisco, you're in the right place. If you're not going to San Francisco, you're about to have a really long evening.

We'd like to tell you now about some important safety features of this aircraft. The most important safety feature we have aboard this plane is... the flight attendants. Please look at one now. There are five exits aboard this plane: two at the front, two over the wings, and one out the plane's rear end. If you're seated in one of the exit rows, please do not store your bags by your feet. That would be a really bad idea. Please take a moment and look around and find the nearest exit. Count the rows of seats between you and the exit. In the event that the need arises to find one, trust me, you'll be glad you did. (This is excellent advice, and something I always do.) We have pretty blinking lights on the floor that will blink in the direction of the exits. White ones along the normal rows, and pretty red ones at the exit rows.

In the event of a loss of cabin pressure, these baggy things will drop down over your head. You stick it over your nose and mouth like the flight attendant is doing now. The bag won't inflate, but there's oxygen there, promise. If you are sitting next to a small child, or someone who is acting like a small child, please do us all a favor and put on your mask first. If you are traveling with two or more children, please take a moment now
to decide which one is your favorite. Help that one first, and then work your way down.

In the seat pocket in front of you is a pamphlet about the safety features of this plane. I usually use it as a fan when I'm having my own personal summer. It makes a very good fan. It also has pretty pictures. Please take it out and play with it now.

Please take a moment now to make sure your seat belts are fastened low and tight about your waist. To fasten the belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle. To release, it's a pulley thing -- not a pushy thing like your car because you're in an airplane -- HELLO!!

There is no smoking in the cabin on this flight. There is also no smoking in the lavatories. If we see smoke coming from the lavatories, we will assume you are on fire and put you out. This is a free service we provide. There are two smoking sections on this flight, one outside each wing exit. We do have a movie in the smoking sections tonight ... hold on, let me check what it is .... Oh here it is; the movie tonight is Gone with the Wind.

In a moment we will be turning off the cabin lights, and it's going to get really dark, really fast. If you're afraid of the dark, now would be a good time to reach up and press the yellow button. The yellow button turns on your reading light. Please don't press the orange button unless you absolutely have to. The orange button is your seat ejection button.

We're glad to have you with us on board this flight. Thank you for choosing Alaska Air and giving us your business and your money. If there's anything we can do to make you more comfortable, please don't hesitate to ask.

If you all weren't strapped down, you would have given me a standing ovation, wouldn't you?

After landing... Welcome to the San Francisco International Airport. Sorry about the bumpy landing. It's not the captain's fault. It's not the copilot's fault. It's the Asphalt.

Please remain seated until the plane is parked at the gate. At no time in history has a passenger beaten a plane to the gate. So please don't even try.

Please be careful opening the overhead bins because "shift happens."

Posted November 21, 2007 01:03 AM November 21, 2007 01:03 AM

woodman
i haven't heard from you in a while. thought i'd give you an update.
I'm writing this slow because I know you can't read fast. We don't live where we did. my wife read in the newspaper that most accidents happen within 20 minutes of your home, so we moved. I won't be able to send you the address because the last family that lived here took the house numbers when they moved so they wouldn't have to change their address.

This place is really nice. we even has a washing machine. I'm not sure it works so well, though, Last week I put a load of clothes in and pulled the chain, we haven't seen it since.

The weather isn't bad here. It only rained twice last week; the first time for three days and the second time for four days.

About that coat you wanted me to send, the wife said it would be too heavy to send in the mail with the buttons on, so we cut them off and put them in the pockets.

i locked my keys in the car yesterday. i was really worried because it took me two hours to get the wife and kids out.

my sister had a baby this morning, but I haven't found out what it is yet so I don't know if i'm an aunt or uncle. The baby looks just like my brother.

Uncle Bobby Ray fell into a whiskey vat last week. Some men tried to pull him out but he fought them off and drowned. We had him cremated; he burned for three days.

Three of my friends went off a bridge in a pickup truck. Butch was driving. He rolled down the window and swam to safety. my other two friends were in the back, they drowned because they couldn't get the tailgate down.

hope you and the family have a good thanksgiving. if you get by the piggly wiggly save me some yoo hoo's.

Your Favorite websta 20dad.

Hope you enjoyed these! I’m off to the Magna cum Murder convention at Ball State University this weekend. Hope to see some of you there.

Blue skies,

Les

Review of Nigel Bird's novel, SMOKE

2011-10-20T09:31:00.000-07:00

Hi folks,

http://www.amazon.com/Smoke-ebook/dp/B005UO9USY/ref=sr_1_1_title_0_main?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1319128108&sr=1-1

What a delight Nigel Bird’s novel, Smoke was to read! Not simply because it was a crackling good story, wondrously told (which it is), but it was simply refreshing since it began with the depantsing of a young boy and then centered around a dog fight. In these days in this country (U.S.) of rampant Political Correctness gone absolutely amuck and insane—when great books such as Huckleberry Finn are sanitized to suck the very marrow out of their brilliance to satisfy some politicized bullshit group or other who aren’t satisfied to run just their lives or thoughts but want to control the rest of us, refreshing is precisely the word to describe work like Bird’s. With groups of grim-faced citizens who appear to have sphincteritis extremis along with a secret handshake and generous funding for television ads seeking to control the rest of us—it seems to be up to the Brits to show us what this freedom of speech thing that we read about in history books is all about.

Personally, I like dogs. I find most breeds to be fine eating, and, if harvested at younger ages, approaching gourmet status, particularly when sage is used judiciously and not overmuch.

This is a great piece of fiction that shows us a world many aren’t exposed to—that’s a value in itself—but more, it shows how young boys are shaped by the cruelty visited upon them. Now that is valuable. If Jimmy hadn’t been depantsed, if he hadn’t grown up in a world of gamblers and dog fights and people rendered cruel and hard by their circumstances, if he had instead received that moronic version of family life ala the Beave and his kin, then he might have turned out to be a nice man, living in the suburbs, fussing over his lawn, and looking forward to each day selling life insurance and playing golf on the weekends and wondering if his medical insurance will buy his Viagra. But, he didn’t, and neither do millions of other young boys. And, it’s a good thing when a novelist shows us these worlds we perhaps aren’t exposed to. It’s a good thing to see how life smacks down people and shapes them in ways that aren’t good. How else would we know? And if we don’t know, how can we ever hope to change lives and conditions of living?

From billboards and bumper stickers?

Get this novel. It’s the real deal.

Blue skies,

Les

INTERVIEW TODAY

2011-10-18T11:43:00.000-07:00

Hi folks,
Just a reminder--I'm getting interviewed today at 4 pm EST on Giovanni Gelati's radio show, The G-Spot. Here's the link--http://www.blogtalkradio.com/gelatisscoop. I'm not sure if you can hear it live or not, but if not, it should be posted on the site shortly thereafter. I'll post something after the show. I have no idea what he's going to ask so it'll be completely extemporaneous. Hope I don't insert my big foot into my equally big mouth... Ahhh... I know it's gonna happen. Tune in for the trainwreck...

On another note, there's a national news story going on today with which I have a slight connection. It's about voter registration fraud in St. Joe County (IN), where the Democratic Chairman, Butch Morgan, has resigned over the furor. Well, Butch and I are old friends, dating back to our days as classmates at Indiana University at South Bend (IUSB). He was the party co-chairman of our student party when we ran for student body offices. I ran for the president's gig and was elected. In fact, our entire slate was elected.

This past Saturday my wife Mary and I attended the wedding of Courtney Felabom, the son of a mutual friend, John and Angie Felabom. One of the reasons I was anxious to attend was that Butch Morgan was supposed to be there and would be sitting at our table. Well, he never showed up. This morning I got an email from Angie sending me the article on Butch's resignation and we figured out why ol' Butch was a no-show...

Interesting times... and more interesting friends...

Hope you catch the radio interview!

Blue skies,
Les

REVIEW - Luca Veste's story collection LIVERPOOL 5

2011-10-12T10:50:00.000-07:00

REVIEW

Luca Veste’s Story Collection

LIVERPOOL 5

Trestle Press

I bought Luca Veste’s story collection and intended to read it after two other books I had on my queue but I made the mistake of looking at the first page.

There went the ol’ queue! I couldn’t put it down. The very first story, “Dreams” was spellbinding—it just pulled me in and I was caught in the undertow. It was like taking a graduate course in philosophy, except it wasn’t delivered in dry, academic tones, but with a voice that grabbed me from the first sentence when it described an old guy sitting on a bench. Who can resist an old guy sitting on a bench? Maybe you can but not me. I always sit down next to such a person in real life and begin talking—the wisdom of the world resides in such people. And, so it was with “John.” The best stories always make one think. This one did… about my own dreams. A great story always poses more questions than it answers—they open up whole new worlds of possibilities. This one did just that.

The next story, “Model Behavior” was a complete surprise, especially the black humor ending. I’ll never look at Facebook the same way…

“Heavy Sleeper” got me immediately, beginning as it did with a character exactly like myself—my wife tells me the same thing as his wife did—that a bomb going off couldn’t wake him. Same here. As he says about any potential burglars, “I’d make the shittiest guard dog this side of Cerberus.” Guilty… And then it takes a monster turn that caught me completely off-guard! I won’t spoil it for you, but this one was my favorite.

Next up was “Peeling Spuds” and it’s my co-favorite of the collection. I love black humor and this was the blackest and the funniest. Veste also takes a female pov here and does it beautifully.

“He Ain’t Heavy” created a surreal, wonderful, wacko world, with an intellectual brother at odds with his thug of a brother coexisting in a criminal family. Like all of Veste’s stories, the reader is set up until we feel comfortable in the fiction world he’s created—and just when we’re at ease enough to put our feet up on the coffee table and sip the coffee he’s graciously provided… he blindsides us, sucker-punches us, knocks the crap out of us!

Delicious!

In all of his stories, I experienced a physical reaction akin to whiplash. I’m trying to think who writes better endings than Veste and I can’t think of anyone who does so as consistently.

I had one small problem with this collection. There wasn’t enough. I want more! The good news is there’s a rumor he has another collection about ready to go. Hurry up!

http://www.amazon.com/Liverpool-5-ebook/dp/B005UO9QHO/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1318441674&sr=1-1

Blue skies,

Les